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My recent struggle...

Monday, April 22, 2013

Lately, I've been experiencing my first REAL struggle out of this entire journey... It's coinciding with the news of my recent announcement of needing a right hip replacement. Currently, I am going to physical therapy to prep for the surgery. This is new to me. I am in my second week and I'm going every Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings.

I thought I was in shape... and last week when I announced the surgery, I was in a great place mentally. I felt as though this would be a breeze and I was going to recover quickly and become a new woman! But I've had 4 therapy sessions under my belt and I'm worn out. Basically, after just two appointments, I was experiencing pain and twinges of back pain that I haven't felt in over a year. I went in to my appt on Friday and told the therapists that my back was starting to really feel the stress of the therapy and that I was starting to experience the spasms of yesteryear... but they just asked if I wanted another heating pad or pillow... and I just went along with the exercises yet again... Well, on that afternoon, I almost couldn't move... I was in such pain.

With this pain, I went back to an old habit of wanting to eat to feel better... so I went to McDonald's drive-thru for dinner... and then, obviously felt just horrible afterwards!

Saturday, I was participating in a Craft Show and my back was super sore, but I had made a commitment, so I went anyway... and once I set up (super slowly, mind you)... I took 3 ibuprofin... and sat down, near tears... I tried to be cheerful and friendly, but the pain was just near the surface... a couple of hours later, I took 3 more ibuprofin, but nothing was touching the pain and then the back spasms started... and at times, I just couldn't move at all... it was horrible... When the show was over, I somehow managed to pack up and a nice man helped load up my car and I drove home in tears... I took 2 Aleve, had hubby rub some Bengay on my back and crawled into bed and fell asleep.

Sunday, I rested alot and it eased some, and I was able to get out and watch my son perform in his opening show of Guys and Dolls... but still not feeling well, I drove back through McD's again for dinner... Uggh! Then it was just watch tv all night and eat.

Such a struggle when you are feeling miserable and in pain and then let your diet and healthy food choices go downhill completely, when you just KNOW that it's the wrong thing and not even the best "bad" food... just junk!

I couldn't even exercise like usual, due to the pain in my back...

I woke up to a new day and even though I'm still feeling not quite myself and as peppy and happy as my usual self (which is USUALLY very happy)... I still woke up with the effort of staying 100% compliant on my plan... and it's bedtime now and I can thankfully say that I was successful! Thank God! But, it was a struggle... and I know that tomorrow will be as well.

I went to therapy today in tears, and today they listened (tears totally helped!)... We nixed a few exercises, replacing them with standing exercises and a few sitting exercises. I probably won't truly know til tomorrow if it helped... but tonight, I don't feel that bad... so, fingers crossed that it worked. Hopefully, getting rid of the serious pain will get rid of the horrible mood which will get rid of the bad feelings that I'll want to "eat away"... and then I can start focusing on my healthy life again!

I sure hope so!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Doing particular pt exercises while you hip is bad is probably aggravating the back too! Glad they finally listened too you, but sorry it got so bad before they did. Hope it continues to feel better.

    By the way, i had a knee replacement in November and have been doing a regular exercise routine, first with Pt and now on my own regularly ever since. My knee replacement seems like a miracle to me and I hope you find the same of your hip replacement!
    1659 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon

    Sorry about your needing surgery and the pain the physical therapy has brought. Just know just like the 100 plus pounds you shed you can tackle this. The pain will not be forever and hopefully after the hip replacement you will be better than ever before long. You are an inspiration to myself and many others. You can get through this!

    1666 days ago
  • NEEDBU66
    I am sorry about the pain. All of this before surgery, too. I sure hope it works out for you. Food equals comfort is a struggle for everybody. Especially when afterwards we don't feel better but worse and do it all over again. Somehow celary never cuts it.
    1668 days ago
  • ROCKMAN6797
    Keep focus during this trying time. Ultimately these exercises will strengthen those area with pain. I hope the recent changes will come with less pain on your body.

    1668 days ago
    Sorry you're having to go through that. Hope you feel better soon.
    1669 days ago
    Praying for you Marie! I am glad they finally listened to what you were saying. I was ready to say you needed to find a new therapist! Some pain is expected but not like you were talking about!. emoticon
    1669 days ago
    I hope these newer exercises make a big difference for you. Isn't strange how tough we can be on ourselves yet we would never be that tough on someone else? Could you get your son or husband to take care of dinner for a couple of nights, especially when you are in such pain.
    1669 days ago
    I'm so sorry you couldn't get yourself heard in time to avoid that pain! Even the best-trained physical therapist or doctor isn't going to know your body like you do. I hope today is going better for you.
    1669 days ago
  • KELLY19770
    I'm so sorry! Back pain is the worst. You are obviously a strong woman mentally and physically to have done what you've done with weight loss, and this (McDs) is just a small bump in the road. emoticon
    1669 days ago
    I'm sorry. This sounds like a tough few weeks. Good luck with your surgery. If you decide you have to eat something not diet friendly, at least choose something with SOME nutritional value. Then even if you feel bad for eating off track, your health won't pay as big a price.
    1670 days ago
    I'm sorry you are having such a hard time of it. It is a shame it took tears for them to actually listen to you but I'm glad they finally did.

    Stay strong and don't beat yourself up if you slip a little. You'll get back on track.
    1670 days ago
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