Sunday, April 21, 2013
This is what I always do! My head is down. I am working towards my goal and doing good...then I weigh and lose focus! Either the number is not what I want to see and I get discouraged or the number is what I want and I get too lax thinking I made it somewhere!
Today was unsuccessful I would say. Compared to my old eating habits, it could have been a whole lot worse, but that is no excuse! I need to focus on where I am still headed! I have made progress and that is great but I am not there yet and once I get there I must maintain that progress. I will learn. Each day is a learning experience whether I do good or bad. I will learn.
I did get in a 2.2 mile jog this morning and that felt good. Even just losing the weight I have lost has made a considerable difference in how my knees and ankles feel when jogging. It is nice. I am going to try and at least get in some time on my stationary bike each day this week. That is my fitness goal for this week. We'll see how that goes.
Food wise, I need to focus. I need to plan, in my head at least, what I am going to eat and when and then I need to stick to that. I think for the time being I am going to stick to what I was doing in cycle 2 and add in 2 slices of whole wheat bread. I am nervous about going carb crazy if I have too many options. Options with food aren't good for me nutritionally. When I used to binge bad, I would even go to 2 food places for take out because I wanted two different things...I am ashamed to say that, but it is the truth. I had such an unhealthy relationship with food. I still crave that stuff and get the urge to go get take out, but I am fixing it. I am slowly working to change that relationship and try to accept food for what it is...nutrition and fuel.
It is really hard. Some days are easier than others. All day long I have tried to remind myself how hard I have worked to get to today. That is what I need to remember on these difficult days. All the hard work. I don't want to ruin all the hard work. I know how easy it was to put on and how hard it can be to take off. When things get challenging (like the kids being sick), I need to remember that and push through without letting food win. I will get better and stronger.
Thankfully the kids are better. For right now anyways! When they are good, I am good! I thrive on sleep and stress free days! I have come to realize how much sleep (or the lack of) affects everything. My kids are growing though...I am sad for that, but sleep should become more consistent and I am happy for that.
So, to head into next week, I am putting my head back down, pushing forward with blinders on, and planning for success. If at first I don't succeed, try, try again. Day 2 of cycle 3 is a new day.