Sunday, April 21, 2013
Day 19, closing in on the 3 weeks of a new lifestyle. I did not exercise today. There was no internal battle, no little voice today. I just opted to take a day of rest today. Instead, I chose to play minecraft with the family, do some glamor work at home, and teach my daughter a little more about the power of google.
I made decent enough choices for the most part, how can I say no when the family asks so nicely for home made buttermilk pancakes? My breakfast ended up being higher than usual because of it. I am still finding that I am eating "empty calories" in that I am at the very very low end for protein at the high end for calories.
We are nearing the end of the pay period, so we are out of most fruits/veggies (not that the ones that we have in the fridge are looking very appetizing). Thinking it may be a better idea to buy fruits on sale, chop and freeze them instead of trying to eat them fresh.(have not looked into the bagged frozen fruits lately but they seemed a little more expensive than the fresh the last time I did look.
Vegetables are my other slippery high wire act. I have just not been cooking them. I have frozen bagged veggies to steam easily. They were inexpensive (1$ for a bag), but they sit in the freezer mocking me. I need to find a way to force myself to open the freezer during meal preparations and consciously decide to put the veggies in the steamer. I do not "dislike" the vegetables. Perhaps it is the idea of those vegetables getting on my plate and taking up valuable carbohydrate/fat real estate. A still lingering self sabotage, because I still have not fully implemented the portion plates, still pile two helpings of main course on the portion plate. I wonder if I am in the wrong frame of mind for the portion plate. I see it as a restriction on myself. I am unsure how to break this mindset to get into the portion plate.
Family note: I played with the daughter today. She is so used to me doing all the work and her running off and playing with new toys that I create in gaming world. Today, I showed her how to tab google the recipes that she needed to build her own gaming "toys". She was terrified, and then poof, she was squealing about how great it was. She managed to create her own farming train in minecraft all by herself. Of course she added the extras to her toy to change colors to suit her mood, but the point of the exercise was to have her do something herself and then reinforce the great feeling of accomplishing something on her own. (being an only child this gets overlooked too often). She chattered about her new toy in the game for hours afterwards, I am thinking I managed a success there.
Emotionally constipated husband on the other hand, does not understand me at all, maybe it is me. Weekends are nice, but they are like the busy hours at a regular job. Not only do I have 3 meals to cook, but I have to pick up after 2 people all weekend. Just to sit down to blog today, I had a computer desk to clean up first. They know better than to leave a mess. Yet they do it every time. I have tried the "Or ELSE", leaving it for them to do (that was the grossest stalemate I've ever been party to), and taking away privelages (daughter has gone months without arts and craft time without any disappointment at all!). Not sure how to break the pair of them from the mindset of pig life.