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Health aides only for 3 weeks. Shucks!

Friday, April 12, 2013

It looks like the additional (free to me) aides will be coming for only 3 weeks. I will try to make the best use of them. Training them takes my time. There is no way around that.

It is not only an aide. It is also OT,PT,nurse, social worker. Really I have to initially be here with them. So one whole week of the 3, I am still tied up.... Oh well!

The rule is as long as he needs a nurse. What he needs is not really nursing. He has minor skin problems right now so we can justify this to Medicare. I am pursuing a mental health aspect. He is unable to initiate anything by himself. He just sits and watches TV. There is so much daily care that he needs, I find it hard to also take care of providing him with other activities, too.

I just love the SYSTEM! NOT! Chris

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IAMWINNING 4/13/2013 9:52PM

    It's terrible that someone (you) who so needs help finds it so difficult to get!!

Have you tried the County Agency on Aging - at least for suggestions of where you can get SOME help? I'm praying the Lord will continue to uphold you.

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IKACEY 4/13/2013 6:52PM

    Chris this is most frustrating and stressing for you I know. So Sorry you have to go through this. emoticon I will keep you in prayer emoticon . There are some good friends giving you good support and advice here. Please know we care! emoticon
IKacey co-leader of the Chair Exercise Team


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GAYLLYNNE 4/13/2013 8:13AM

    I'm so sorry you are going through this. I went through similar things with my parents. Please hang on and know you have friends here! Hugs!!!

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1STATEOFDENIAL 4/13/2013 2:08AM

    The aide is supposed to be doing some social work help, so why not ask him/her about what can be done to extend the help? You might have to do some training, but in amongst that be asking questions and probing for information.

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ELSCO55 4/12/2013 10:30PM

    prayinhg for you

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123ELAINE456 4/12/2013 10:11PM

  Most of the suggestions have already been mentioned. You said awhile back about selling your place and moving close to your Family where they could help you with him. May be that is something You Might like to do. Think about it. You are doing a Great Job with Your Husband. God Blessings to You and Everyone. Have a Very Nice Day. Take Care. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment edited on: 4/12/2013 10:12:30 PM

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LINDAF49 4/12/2013 8:30PM

    Chris, learn everything you can about how the system works and get a client advocate on your side...even this three weeks can show you what a potential it is...speak out and say you need help like this to continue...be specific and throw in a few big words as you learn them for neeeds and conditions etc. In the mean time, watch how others interact with DH and how he interacts with them! notice the changes good and bad that happen when they are in the home and talk, talk, talk to those who hold the purse strings and employment areas of your case.

Also talk with DH and tell him you are at the end of your rope...hanging on by a thread and that you need him to CARE about himself enough to wrok at JOY, to try to DO something with his day, to want to life life as fully as he can...i am NOT a pill pusher but would a low dose mood elevator help???

For you, good food, good exercise, good music, funny stories or movies ...anything to lift you up...touch base with a ladies' Bible study and tell them you need ones to come along beside you and encourage you!!! HUGS.


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GRAMMACATHY 4/12/2013 7:25PM

    Do not slap on the "everythings okay" face. Advocate for him, just like you would a student. It's a shame I had to toss my husband out of the house to get help for him. You might mention that to them, that your health is compromised and you don't want to end up like a friend of yours getting sick and leaving the person you love. Enough of my rant. I know you will do the right thing and advocating is hard work, but better than your back breaking down. I am so glad you retired too.

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JILL313 4/12/2013 7:02PM

    I'm sorry Chris they wouldn't be there long with him as it would help unload your burden so much. I know they are tight when it comes to any kind of nursing or long term care. You're in a tough situation that's for sure. It sure puts a damper on doing things you need to do and you have to get out from time to time. Does he have a caretaker at home besides you? Can you afford to hire a nursing student that could watching him some days so you could get out of the house more? I have no answers but I'll be praying for you both.

Hugs,

Jill emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CATHEMARIE 4/12/2013 5:24PM

    Praying for you all.

emoticon

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SUGARSMOM2 4/12/2013 4:51PM

  well life is sure busy and we all have a spot that we are in . help is almost not there at times when we need it and at other times we have to much help and why cant we find it all the time .

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STITCH4EVER 4/12/2013 4:26PM

    I SURE WISH SOMEONE WOULD GIVE YOU A BREAK FOR A CHANGE. YOU JUST CAN'T SEEM TO CATCH ONE AND NEITHER CAN I. AT LEAST IT'S NICE TO KNOW YOU AREN'T IN IT ALONE, ALTHOUGH THERE ARE MANY TIMES IT FEELS LIKE THAT.
ERIN

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FROSTY99 4/12/2013 2:17PM

    Our whole healthcare system is so frustrating. I pray these workers will have some good suggestions for continuing help that doesn't cost a fortune.
I had a friend who had adult daycare for her DH while she worked. It was sponsored by the Catholic church so wasn't too terribly expensive. She even arranged it later where he only went a couple days a week to help with the costs.
Hope and pray you at least can get a break for a couple of weeks.
emoticon
Pat

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SHIRAZSOLLY 4/12/2013 11:50AM

    Mental health, unfortunately, is not liable to be a good avenue for you to pursue. Medicare is not much interested in depression - except to provide medication.

They are much more likely to cover rehab type work as LONG as he shows willingness to do the work and ability to improve from it. BOTH conditions have to apply. There is a lot of paperwork involved and providers have to jump through a lot of hoops to make sure conditions are EXTREMELY clear so they are not at risk of being audited for Medicare fraud. It's ridiculous, I know.

The new "Obamacare" system will eventually, we hope, sort all that out, but we are at least 4 years away from that working because the insurance people, the lawyers and the states are all arguing.

In the meantime, getting him out of the house, even for a stroll around the block in his wheelchair on nice days might be good for all concerned. In my county, we have a FREE service that picks up people who are in wheelchairs and takes them to medical appointments and occasionally even to social events like Bingo. You have to make appointments a couple days in advance, but it gets them out of the house.

Was he a veteran, by chance? If so, the VA health system is most certainly NOT the greatest, but there are usually some sweet volunteers (ahem!) who can help hook you up with local services.

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WALLAHALLA 4/12/2013 11:43AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ALIHIKES 4/12/2013 10:42AM

    So sorry Chris! I hope there can be a long term solution to get you the help you need to care for him emoticon

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NASFKAB 4/12/2013 9:39AM

  hope you can get some respite as well

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NELLJONES 4/12/2013 9:04AM

    Getting old is very expensive. I went through that with my MIL (though nursing homes in Arkansas are cheaper than they are here) and now my mother. Her continuing care place is expensive, but for people who need round the clock are it can be $15k a month on top of living expenses. And Medicare covers none of it. When all their money is gone they can go into a nursing home, but no guarantee that it will be nearby, just somewhere in the state.

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NPA4LOSS 4/12/2013 8:46AM

    Hopefully they can give you some ideas while they are with you.

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FITMARY 4/12/2013 8:36AM

    Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that! Well, maybe having the new people there even for a few weeks will stimulate him to get out of the t.v. rut.... I hope so!
emoticon

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SAGARINO 4/12/2013 8:06AM

    Chris How frustrating for you. Is there no program that give you some help/respite on a regular basis? Praying for you emoticon

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CAPECODLIGHT 4/12/2013 8:01AM

    I would think the OT might have some good ideas on things for him to do that he would enjoy and help him therapeutically.

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WENDYSPARKS 4/12/2013 7:58AM

    I hope things will be ok...Love you!!

Wendy emoticon

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AZMOMXTWO 4/12/2013 7:53AM

  prayers that one of the people who come in to help makes a recomendation for more help and a time out for you so that you get to rest and have a day or at least some time off

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SANDRALEET 4/12/2013 7:36AM

    The more we do the less help we get

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