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Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Wow, I have really let things slide. I am just so unbelievably busy these days that I don't seem to have any control over anything. It is a horrible feeling - to feel that you have no control of your own life!

A lot of the problem is this having to move to Houston. I don't WANT to move to Houston, waaaaaa, waaaaaa, waaaaaa. Yes, I am being a total baby about this. I don't want my son to have nasty radiation. I don't want him to have nasty chemotherapy. I want to lie down and cry, and go to sleep and wake up to find everything back to normal.

OK, pity party over. I was pretty favorably impressed with the (world famous, evidently) radiation oncologist. My ex-husband and his wife have researched her thoroughly, read everything there is to know about her, watched all her youtube videos, investigated her credentials, etc. Me, well, I figure that if she works at M. D. Anderson, she is probably a fine doctor, and that's all I need to know.

What I was less favorably impressed with was the sheer number of people who introduced themselves and gave me their cards. Am I going to be able to put the right name with the right face for even one of them? No. Do they really need this many people, all promising to find answers to any question I might have (of which there are none)? I doubt it.

I got kind of frustrated by what I felt was my ex and his wife taking over all the conversations and interrupting me when I was trying to answer questions. Admittedly, some of the questions it was appropriate for them to answer - but interrupting when I was giving details of how long he had been sick and telling me that he threw up at their house before he threw up at mine I felt was unnecessary interrupting. I also found it interesting that neither of them had ever mentioned it to me before. Just a little strange, since they can't pretend to think that I wouldn't have been interested. I am being bitchy, I know...just that this whole situation is rough and I react badly to having no control over things. I know that Danny's dad loves him very much and is just trying to help. He wants Danny well just as much as I do.

The facility is quite impressive overall, and I do feel that they will do their best to take care of my child, which is the important thing.

One other overwhelming thing about the visit/appointments is that, all of a sudden, tons of new appointments seemed to be necessary. Now he needs an appointment with an endocrine specialist, because his father thinks that his growth is stunted. Nonsense! I am afraid I started the whole paranoid thing, because I made a bigger deal than I should have of the fact that Danny's growth curve, as documented by his pediatrician, indicated that he is likely to be about 5'8" as an adult. This is a perfectly normal height, not an outlier, and it is well within what would be expected for someone whose mother's family have all been very short.

But, as I say, I made more of a big deal out of it than I should, mostly because Danny's older brother has every bit of his father's height and a bit more. So what? It's the vagaries of genetics and it is indeed a crap shoot (forgive the crude language). But I must have put the idea into Dave's head that Danny should be taller and he must be lacking in growth hormone. In his enthusiasm to make things better, he tried to convince both the radiation oncologist at MDA, and the medical oncologist here, that Danny needs growth hormone. They both said no, that he doesn't need it unless he is deficient, or unless it appears that the radiation has damaged the growth plates in his bones. But, now we are stuck with an appointment with an endocrinologist. Which I wouldn't mind if I didn't have twenty other things to do to get ready to move.

And we are also stuck with an evaluation with an ophthalmologist, which, like his hearing test, is based on the premise that damage to his vision may occur, and they want to have a baseline to judge by. Sigh.

On the plus side (or it would be if I wanted to go to Houston), we have delivered our pets to the wonderful people who are caring for them while we are out of town, and I am very, very happy with the arrangements. Cotton and Pepper will be very well cared for.

Here is a picture of my happy-go-lucky son at MDA. He remains pretty cheerful through it all, enduring what has to be endured and making the best of everything. I should learn from him!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Aww, he looks cute with his new haircut! Sounds like it's never a dull moment and an avalanche of information to remember. While it may seem annoying that all of these people are giving you their cards in case you have questions, it's better to have them and not need them than need them and not have them. And I don't blame you a bit for being irritated about Danny's dad failing to inform you that he vomited during one of his visits.. if any adult I entrusted my child to failed to give me important medical information about my child that occurred while my child was in their care, I'd be ticked too. That's just not something that's ever okay to conceal from a child's mother. Looks like he's being treated at a nice facility and I'm glad to hear he has a good doctor. emoticon
    1802 days ago
    Oh, don't worry about his height, just get him healthy. My son is really small. He may not ever get to over 5.5, but he doesn't even care! Besides, I've heard the growth hormone shots are not pleasant and you guys probably have enough on your plate right now to worry about that!
    All my prayers to you and your family!
    1803 days ago
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