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remember when i said

Tuesday, April 09, 2013

That if I am being quiet, it ain't good?

Well this week proved that once again....

My niece who is 21 came for a week long visit. I think I cooked twice. I baked. I had a poker party with pizza and cocktails. I barely walked the dog.

I'm a mess. I refuse to get on the scale. You might hear me screaming on the east coast. She left Sunday. I made a meal plan for the week, we started walking again(why does my back hurt soooo much?). Yesterday some leftover Reeves peices needed to be eaten so I accommodated them and today, I'm finally starting to settle down. Gah, it is so hard to recover from those kinds of binges!

This is not always an easy thing, to get healthy. It is not always pretty. But,I think what is important here is that I am not giving up and I will get back on track, probably to fall off the rails again but this is never over so I don't suppose binges and cookies and candies are never going to be over either.

Just another cautionary tale.

And if you noticed someone is being quiet? Check in. They may need a friend. Or a kick. Or a hug. Usually its not because everything is so you guys... jan
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hmmmm. All I'm thinkin' is ... your niece is sooooooo lucky to have a fun aunt who she wants to visit for a week. You had fun with her, you made wonderful lovely memories with her ... just because you were on another track doesn't mean that didn't get you somewhere wonderful too! And now you have the luxury of switching back to the straight track.

    I think you've been very successful all the way around.

    1805 days ago
    It seems like lately, I'm a weekly "recovery" plan. I get all this stuff in my head like "I'm gonna do it this week" and then... nothing... I always feel like I'm back at square one. We just need to be thankful it's not square ONE ONE, or we'd both be in a mess. We can do this Jan, I know we can. We were rockin' it, WTF happened?!? I haven't gotten on the scale in nearly a month, and if I did, I KNOW you'd hear me out in Cali! Oh Jan... we need to stop taking orders from cookies and pizza and start being the boss. We can do this!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1806 days ago
    "And if you noticed someone is being quiet? Check in. They may need a friend. Or a kick. Or a hug. Usually its not because everything is so you guys... "

    * back at ya. Yeah, Iv'e been quiet for the past year or so. It is a struggle enough to blog and be active when things are just going along.
    1806 days ago
    You're so right. Blogging here is one of the things that I NEED to do to stay on track. When I'm quiet it is never good. NEVER NEVER NEVER give up.
    1806 days ago
    Sorry you had a "bad" week, and I know you've requested more tough love but you know I'm no good at that, so...I say, eh, it happens. And it'll happen again. And you'll get through it and over it and past it and you'll come out the other side of this whole process healthier - but nobody does it perfectly all the time and everybody takes little breaks from perfect eating and perfect exercising and as long as these little breaks don't become permanent, it's really no big deal. Some people even think this kind of thing helps with weight loss by "confusing" your body with extra rest or extra calories or whatever, and then when you turn the engines back on and start up with the healthy stuff again your body is extra susceptible to losing weight! :) I have no idea if that's true or not, but that's what I always liked to tell myself when I had a week or two like yours. (Particularly the week when I went out of town with my husband to defend my MA thesis back in the city where my grad school was - we had moved after I finished my coursework but then I dragged my heels regarding the thesis - and anyways, I spent the whole week sitting on my butt preparing my presentations and going over my notes and editing final drafts and eating Quiznos and Chex Mix and cupcakes and god knows what else - and I gained 11 pounds in 7 days but of course it was mostly if not all water weight and it dropped away completely within about 2 weeks. Sorry for the really long parenthetical aside!)
    1807 days ago
    Good point!
    1807 days ago
    You're right . . . quiet doesn't necessarily mean all is all right!

    But you'll find you're way back. HUGS
    1807 days ago
  • DAISY443
    You are back! Yay!
    1807 days ago
    1807 days ago
    I just logged on right now to check on you because you have been too quiet! You see? We know each other pretty darn well at this point. You are a terrible brat, right? Wanna have food, wanna have fun, wanna be a rebel. Until it feels wrong and you stop. I've always admired the way you embrace life and really live it. At the same time, I wish for you to be healthy and strong -- and that requires exercise and avoiding junky food. Somewhere there exists a happy medium, and you will find it.
    1808 days ago
  • CANNIE50
    Oh, sweetie pie, I am glad you are here, sharing your struggle. I was just where you are, a couple of weeks ago (and had been there for a looong time). I SO know this feeling, this food-rebellion and lack of willingness. I have begun tracking again, and I have been focused on getting in enough nutrients (as opposed to just trying to get the least amount of calories),and I do feel better. The only thing I can say is that I literally prayed for help and willingness, and I spent some time really facing some ugly facts about how much weight I had regained and how many destructive habits I had let back into my life. I really faced facts and I kept coming back to this one: as uncomfortable as it can be to lose weight, it is usually only uncomfortable for a total of several hours a day (all the cravings fought through and denied, exercising, etc.) but being out of control with food and obese is uncomfortable ALL day, every day. If I could make peace with this weight, and live comfortably in my own skin this way, I would because all this weight loss stuff is EXHAUSTING, except when it isn't. Except when I find a rhythm, and I surprise myself by being more disciplined than I thought I was, I start to feel so much better, and so much better about myself. You have been there and I want you to come to that place again. Dive on in, Mama, the water is start by getting in 50 grams of protein before noon - I promise, this really does help stop the binge cycle. I am here for you doll. I think of you so often and had a really strong premonition to text you one day recently and am mad at myself that I didn't but, we can only go forward and learn the lessons. love, me
    1808 days ago
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