Tuesday, April 09, 2013
You all are giving me a push in the right direction. I wish I could find a craft he was interested in. I have tried some things but nothing took.
These are things i have tried in the past 7 years to interest him in a hobby. Remember he can't use his right hand--well -- if he exercised it, he could 'have it back' the therapist said. But he won't exercise it without someone with him. Yup--I am frustrated!
A 3D puzzle of NYC. He is from near NYC. The first layer is a map. the second layer is building replicas. And these are put in following their numbers. In order of the populating of NYC. the whole thing is fascinating! He would not do it! Finally Ginny and her boyfriend and me did it at Christmastime. He watched a little and got to talking sometime. I really wish it had lit him up. He loves history and knows lots.
Legos were recommended so I got a kit that made a big construction truck. It had batteries I think and would move when it was done. He was an engineer and worked first as an inspector on construction sites. I thought he'd like it. But no.
If we had kids around I guess he'd make the lego thing with them or at least watch. But daughter is not ready for kids. I could befriend someone with kids, I suppose, but all that would be a huge thing for me. Our condos have mostly older people who dote on their grandchildren. I have not befriended them--yet.
The computer--- he will use this only if someone helps him. Email was too hard for him now. (Remember he changed from engineering to computer programming!) He did some solitaire. And he'd read the bookmarked blogs he set up before his stroke. There is a new kind of computer for older people. But I hesitate to spend that money now. and, again, he needs me to sit with him.
I bought him Dragon Naturally Speaking .I had some friends come here to help him. the woman was a computer pro at my school. She brought her older son. But when John tried to use it the program made too many mistakes. I think his voice is not clear enough for it. And he got flustered fixing the mistakes.
I asked my woodworking brother to give me an idea of something John could sand and/or polish. John collects old woodworking planes. My brother sent him an antique plane. First of all you should not sand and polish an antique. Second John wasn't interested. He thought it was busy work.
I have had him cut up the vegetables at holiday time. That went OK. We worked together to make the holiday meal. As a rule he is not interested in food preparation.
These are only a sample of the things I have tried. As I said, nothing takes. Motivation has to come from inside him. He has not gotten over the grieving process of the stroke consequences. He has not don the anger step. You can't force a person to do that.