I'm stressed, but it's not as bad as I thought it would be
Monday, April 08, 2013
I got a phone call this afternoon at work. They called me into head office for a meeting. It's not good. I know it's not good. I knew that right from when I got the phone call.
Things have been touchy since I had to go to HR to get fair treatment with my hours. My immediate supervisor's nose has been out of joint right from that day, and it's never really gotten any better.
Anyhow, I'm worried. Very worried. My stomach hurts. That doesn't surprise me.
What does is that I'm dealing with it so much better than I thought I would be.
Worst case senario - I'm fired. Well, I don't see that as likely. If I'm not mistaken, I have to get at least one written reprimand. I have not even had a verbal one, so I don't think it'll go straight to no job
I might be getting laid off. Work is slowing down right now. Road bans. I get it. And if it's a layoff, maybe it's a good thing right now. It'll give me a chance to get my feet back under me health wise. I don't know how I'll manage without a paycheck, or how long it will last. It's looking like a long road ban this year.
It could be a layoff. I'm hoping I can deal with that. I guess I'll find out.
It could just be a written reprimand. I do have a bad attitude at times. And I don't put up with anyone's crap. I have no problems going over someones head if I need to. That doesn't sit well with the small town mentality around here. That's another thing I have a bad attitude about, but that's another issue.
As for how I'm dealing with it?
I didn't go running today. I hit the fridge right after work. I'm not over my calorie range today, and if I stop the snacking I won't be. I turned my snack into supper.
Despite these, I still say I'm coping not too bad. I'm just relaxing. There's nothing I can do about the meeting tomorrow until then. Heck, I can't even do anything about it then except show up and find out what it is. What's done is done. Period. Panicking will only make me sick. I really don't need that.
Instead, I sat and thought about it. What is the worst thing? What are the chances that's it? Can I cope with it? What else could it be? and so on.
Fired? I don't think that's likely - because of the company size. I think I need written reprimands, etc first. Can I live with it? It'll hurt, but yep. I can. I say a job posting for another oil field company the other day. Surprise surprise, the office is across the street. Seriously. Across the street and 2 houses down from where we live. No more driving. As much as I like my job, maybe....
Reprimand? It may be. I haven't had a verbal, so I don't know if this is even a possibility, but it may well be. Who knows. Can I deal with this? Sure. It's actually the least negative of the negative possibilities.
Layoff? Maybe. I haven't had anything to do at work for over a week now. Part of the crap that's going on at work - all the work is being kept by the other girl. she's trying to justify her overtime, and the boss is behind her. I don't really care, but come on already. If there is a layoff, I'll be sure to bring this up in the meeting tomorrow. Can I deal with this? Sure. I was looking into possibly taking some time off for my health anyway. I will ask about health coverage though. I doubt I'll be able to keep it, but who knows. Maybe I will.
Could I be completely wrong? Maybe, but not likely. I know I'm not likely going to get a raise. Maybe they want to move me to another location to work until the road bans end and work picks up again. Maybe it's a review of my work. The company is supposed to do these once a year, so who knows. I wish they would have taken another approach to let me know about it, other than letting me sit here and worry, but who knows. Any of these can be dealt with too.
Thinking of what it could possibly be, and if I could deal with those outcomes has really helped keep me on an even keel today. I really don't know what to make of this. I'm thinking the mood enhancers of the Visi Trimma have really helped me deal with this mess. Regardless, I'm putting this issue away. There's nothing I can do about it until meeting time tomorrow. Even then, all I can do is cope with the results of that meeting.