Ahhh, it's such a relief to make it through a big event and have everything go well!
The food cooperative had our annual member meeting yesterday, and I was designated "the facilitator."
And given the fact that one of the board members hates me, and does his absolute best to undermine everything I do....given the in-fighting and personality conflicts on the board....the fact that most of the membership hates our volunteer GM and they frequently get heated and personal when it comes to "discussions" with him....and our celebrity keynote?
I've been on tenderhooks all week, trying to figure out the likely topics of discussion, sources of arguments and contention, and the danger areas that might lead to a repeat of our infamous board meeting where two board members actually stood up and shouted at each other, banging fists on tables and swearing up a storm, for 15 minutes before we calmed them down.
Clearly I survived it! But it has been a stressful couple of weeks!
A couple of fights almost broke out, but I quenched them fast. Overall, everyone was really happy with the way the discussion went, and we have four new board members who will be great for the cooperative! And we drew a big crowd...for our cooperative, at least.
Did I stick to my resolution to avoid alcohol? No, I'm really ashamed to say I didn't. But then I got pretty sick last night, so I figure karma has had her retribution - and the desire to drink more is not there at all, and probably won't be for a long time.
I managed to avoid the camera for all but this one picture - and you can probably see how hard I'm gritting my teeth as I try to keep our membership discussion under control!
I feel like I just made it through a massive psychological marathon full of land mines, and it definitely feels GREAT! Though I am finally noticing how tight my neck and shoulders are, from all the stress, so I'll definitely have to focus on yoga and stretching for the next couple of weeks to loosen those knots.
Volunteering shouldn't feel like this. I know that, and it's a big part of why I've wanted to leave the board for the last few months. I don't know if the new board members will be able to improve the situation as much - or as fast - as I need them to for me to feel comfortable and happy to serve the cooperative.
But I believe in the cause, and honestly, no one else was really stepping up. Maybe I'm crazy, but I didn't feel like I could leave the board until certain issues were resolved. Whether I serve out my remaining year as a board member, or whether I do decide in a few months that I am not needed and I resign, we're in a better place now than we were a few months ago when this whole thing really started!