150,000-199,999 SparkPoints 176,750

Forgiving ourselves

Sunday, April 07, 2013

Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it." Mark Twain

Many of us on this weight loss journey have had life crushing experiences. We may have been traumatized , abused or forgotten. We may have been victims of crime, date rape ,or sadly sick family members.

These acts may have crushed or bruised our spirits. They may have diminished our will. Taken some of the fight out of us. They may have caused us to live life a different way.

A life filled with guilt , shame , sorrow and fear is no life at all. Believe me because that is how I used to live. Hiding and burying sorrow . Because it was my fault after all. I found solace in food ,and hid away from life.

Then one day with a lot of help, I forgave. Oh no not the act . Never that. I forgave me.
Me for living through it, for going forward, for having strength and will power and determination. I realized that the person was not well and I had to forgive to move on. I had to realize that it was not my fault, just something that happens to more people than I could ever realize.

I realized that the rest of my life held hope and promise . By forgiving I set my self free. My attacker could live with the guilt and shame but there was no longer a reason I needed too. I stopped hiding and using food for solace and really started living.

I really hope some of you can do the same . May the rest of your lives be filled with Joy my friends. May you wake up and greet the new day with love , hope and promise. May you see the beautiful world filled with love and understanding that God has created for you and leave the sorrow guilt and shame to the darkness. That is my Sunday morning prayer for you my friends .Because with forgiveness we find love. Hugs
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Forgiveness the best gift given to us !! Frees us all -Good one Joanne!! emoticon
    1776 days ago
    They say holding a grudge is like drinking poison and then expecting the OTHER person to forgiveness really is the only way. emoticon
    1776 days ago

    I love this blog!
    1777 days ago
  • JACKIE542
    Forgiveness is very important. I am glad that you were able to forgive and move on and not let them take any more away from you. We all need to do that in our lives. Hope you have a great Sunday. emoticon
    1777 days ago
    Hugs and I so agree. I let my attacker ( my mother in law) live in my life too long. I mean that in that I gave her so much power. She was extremely extremely verbally abusive to me, so much so that her son told her to get the F out and she wasn't welcome to live with us any longer and leave NOW. anyway for quite a few years I would feel such hatred towards her then realized she has no clue that what she said even bothers me any more and she alway refused to say she even said or did what she did. So why am I allowing this hatred to fester inside me and make such a mess. So I said okay lady, I don't have to forget what you said but will forgive you in that you were very jealous that your 2nd marriage failed for the 2nd time but yet your son was doing fine.... I will forgive that and felt better after I was able. I am now fine with her but will not be alone wih her for any length of time as as soon as she has me alone it is OH Pooor Murray and his life......... give me a break we have been married 36 years this

    So no matter what happened to any of us dont let the person give you guilt, or anger cos it only festers and boils in us and makes us toxic and often they dont even know.

    1777 days ago
  • HOLLYM48
    I am so sorry for whatever trauma you lived thru but congratulations for moving past it and moving forward. Huge accomplishment I am sure.
    There is so much good in so many people and we can't control how others act, only how we react to them. Find joy everyday, that is a great motto to live by.
    emoticon emoticon
    1778 days ago
    Wonderful Joanne emoticon

    Have a great Sunday emoticon
    1778 days ago
    Great blog!
    1778 days ago
    1778 days ago
    1778 days ago
    And much joy to you as well.
    have a terrific Sunday!
    1778 days ago
    oh you speak to me.

    when I realized how my family dynamics were eating me up, I began refusing to participate in family events. I started to grow and achieve my goals.

    you'd think family dynamics would change? nope.

    so family is pressing for me to participate, but they were the ones 'isolating' me in the first place. this is tearing me up inside, and I have hell of difficulties now because of it. but they ain't never gonna change, I know it. right now it's a terrific blockade for me.

    so i'll follow your advice, forgive MYSELF for reacting negatively to their negativity, just smile at family and continue to go my own way.
    1778 days ago
    BEAUTIFULLY said. FORGIVENESS AND LOVE are the answers! I'm so glad you found the answers to JOY and I know you are helping so many others find Joy.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1778 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.