Thursday, April 04, 2013
I promise pictures to come. I am at a total loss. My baby boy, my first dog that was mine even if he thought he was my husband's, has brain cancer. He was given 3 to 6 months to live. At the diagnosis his quality of life was determined good enough to live it out until.... But, I don't know if it is the effects of the anesthesia or if his disease progressed just like that, but he can't even seem to walk across the floor without falling.
He's only 8. He is my baby. He is soon to be my last straw. I'm not sure I can do this grief thing any more. Someone told me that brighter days are ahead. That things will turn.... I don't believe it. I've been a diabetic for 45 years, blind for 23, lost both sibs 8 years ago, lost my mom not even 4 months ago, my dad is paralyzed from a stroke, my baby boy, my precious pooch is going to die. When is it going to turn? It hasn't turned in 45 years. So, when? I'm usually pretty optimistic. My positivity was sucked right out of me with the news of Jack. I love him so much. How does life go on? I know it will, but how? How do I go back to work? How do I resume my life? I'm not sure at this moment. I'm lost, lost, lost and yes, broken. Help!