Thursday, April 04, 2013
Last night I had my first fast food meal in almost 3 months. I usually go to my parents house once a week to watch Justified (season finale last night...AWWWESOMEsauce!). Usually I budget my calories because I know they end up cooking stuff a little higher in calories/carbs/sodium than I do. But last night they decided to get Captain D's instead since my dad had a doctor's appointment. My parents do not get fast food much, so this was unusual for them too.
I could have went there and ate something different. But you know what? Fish sounded good. It wasn't ridiculously unreasonable in nutrition as long as I was careful. I ended up eating 2 pieces of battered fish, a half-cup of green beans, half a serving of fries, and a stuffed crab shell. And even a tablespoon of ketchup (I used to be the Ketchup queen, so I was most concerned about this). And it was delicious. And yes, I wanted more at the end, but I waited. I kept the plate in front of me and said if in 20 minutes I wanted another piece of fish, I'd get it and not stress about it. And at the end of the 20 minutes, the fish sounded tasty, but I was satisfied enough that I was just "Eh, nevermind."
I didn't go crazy and dive into the box of fries. I didn't grab the fish with my mouth and growl at their cat when she advanced to battle me for it. This morning, I didn't go buckwild and hit up the McD's drive-thru, stuffing my bra with bacon, egg, and cheese biscuits for breakfast and daytime snacks.
What I'm trying to say is, it wasn't the end of the world because I indulged. Or that I didn't think the food was disgusting. And I felt fine afterwards. Other than some sodium bloat, I was perfectly OK other than being exhausted. But I was that way before I ate it.
I think my body understands now that it's OK for me to eat some crazy stuff now and then, but I need to be reasonable about it and make an effort to eat slowly and make some smart choices if I can. Like the half-serving of fries. And even though I want more, I've gotten smart enough to say "Calm down, it isn't like this is the last piece of battered Captain Ds fish you will ever see."
I'm not saying it's SUPER easy. But it's a heck of a lot easier than it was three months ago. I've learned that as long as I don't let myself get too hungry, have backup/prepared meals and go-to snacks, and I try to plan for unusual meals, then I'm going to be a lot less likely to snap up some fast food. But if I do, it really is OK. I may have to nudge my body in the right direction, but it is not my enemy. We can reach a compromise.
So this? MAJOR progress. I'm not saying I will never eat fast food again ever or act like a pig at some point, but my hope is that as long as I stay the course, it will be the 20% rather than the 80% of my diet.
Never give up! Never surrender!