Tuesday, April 02, 2013
I noticed something about myself on the weekend. I am selective about who I tell regarding my lifestyle changes and work to get healthy and strong mentally and physically. Why is that? Because some people seem to take it on as their personal challenge and want to extol all the wisdom that they have about their healthy lifestyles on me. And all of these people are slim and fit. Which I do not begrudge them but theyíve always been that way and have no idea what itís like to be overweight their whole life or to stare down the prospect of losing 100+ lbs. So as soon as I even vaguely mention that Iím trying to eat only healthy choices or get some exercise they offer a multitude of opinions on what to eat, when to eat, what supplements to take, what exercises to do etc. etc. etc. And you know what? Itís freaking ANNOYING.
My problem has never been knowing what to eat or not to eat. Or how much exercise I need. I KNOW all of the fundamentals of weight loss. Itís the MENTAL fortitude to decide to engage these tools, to make it a priority. To overcome the KNOWING-DOING gap. And through all this advice no one who is doling out their nuggets of wisdom offers any sort of advice around this area because they arenít familiar with the mental struggle of an overweight person. I have a friend that lost 130lbs a few years ago. She went from a size 22 to a 2. And she has successfully kept it off for 3 years so far. I shared with her my plan to join her in that department (not that Iíll ever be a size 2, but you know what I mean). And did she offer even one clue as to what to eat or how to exercise? Nope. Not one. She said, Ďthatís great! Let me know if you want someone to walk with.í Because she knows, as it was for her, that itís not a case of knowing or not knowing how to do it. That I had to come to that low point on my own, as she did, and that I had to dig myself mentally out of that hole on my own. As she did.
And in contrast, I mention something about this to my brother on the weekend via phone and he immediately starts doling out advice such as Ďdonít eat dairy or wheat. Just eat saladsí Because this is a man who has been active his entire life. At 40 he weighs the same as he did at 25. A lean 180 with visible ab muscles. He runs, bikes, plays all kinds of sports. He never eats dessert and has never had a sweet tooth. His fiancť is active too and together theyíre two active and fit people. When he gains 5-10lbs he just stops eating dairy and wheat for a few months and drops it again. And thus this is his advice. He has been my brother for 36 years. He has seen me overweight my entire life, lose some weight, gain it back again. And yet still he chalks it up to simply Ďeat less, get more exerciseí and when I say itís just not that easy, he says he doesnít get why itís not. And heís right. He doesnít get it. And neither do most people until theyíve been in the same situation.
So Iím selective about who I tell. I do it unconsciously really. But I realized it when Iíd spent an hour on the phone with my friend (the one who thought it would be fun for me to wash her babies Ė see previous blog post) that not once did I mention it. Because she falls into that category of people who donít get it and believe itís just a case of calories in, calories out. And Iím regretting telling my career coach about this goal Ė he leaves me email and phone messages about protein powders and supplements I should be taking. I want to scream at him Ė ĎIím seeing you to help with all the crap from the neck up! Iíll deal with the stuff from the neck down myself thank you very much!í
I know people just want to help but it doesnít help, it just bugs the crap out of me. Am I being harsh? Yeah probably. But itís my life. My journey. My choices.
We had a beautiful sunny and warm Easter weekend here on the west coast. And I spent most of it inside working on my house renovations. They never end. As soon as I finish one thing, I stare at it and admire it and then start planning the next thing. But I did get out for my C25K run/walk early on Sunday morning as the sun was rising. It was so nice out. Unfortunately, my calf muscle was not on board. Nearing the end of my 3rd Ďroundí of running (of the 30 second run, 2 minute walk rounds), I felt a twinge in my right calf muscle that hurt enough to stop me running. I walked for a bit and decided that I had actually hurt myself enough that I shouldnít run anymore today. So I walked home. It was increasingly sore that day. I iced it and stretched it but itís still pretty sore yesterday and today. So now Iíve gone and injured myself and Iím frustrated because I was feeling good about my running and I have to take a break. I self diagnosed via Google (which we all do) and it seems to just be a regular calf strain but I have to wait 7-10 days until I try running again. And need to do lots of stretching.
I did some yoga yesterday but now Iím frustrated because what else can I do for cardio that isnít going to strain my leg? I wonder if swimming would help or hinder it? Any other ideas?