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    SHRINKING_SARA   29,333
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Good food in Washington, D.C. near convention center?

Monday, April 01, 2013

Lordy lordy lordy I am still super busy.

Less than 18 days until I have to give my thesis to my committee. Last week I met my goal of finishing the first draft of my paper manuscript and I e-mailed it to everyone on Friday… no one has given me edits yet… so… that sucks.

TJ came down for the weekend again. We went on Friday night to watch basketball with friends… and fought a bit. Homeskillet is worried that I’m going to turn psycho so he isn’t ready to commit to anything – so I told him that engagement rings and wedding talk needs to be off the table COMPLETELY. It basically took a lot of talking for me to get it through his head that joking about marriage is like me constantly giving him pregnancy scares. And then he drank and made a marriage joke… which led to more pissiness out of me and then MORE talking. Seriously, I need to go punch his ex-girlfriends. They really messed with his head.

Saturday I got some work done, sold some more of my furniture – I literally only have beds and a desk chair to sit on, oh and exercise balls! My house is getting emptier by the day. Its so weird! Closing is officially April 29th, so I’m going to defend my thesis and move out that same weekend. So weird! Still no job interview lined up, but that’s outta my mind for the next month. If anything, I’ll just stay in my lab for a few more months until I find something. And stay with friends… yea… hmm…

But anyway Saturday was a lazy day. It was rainy and gross. I really wanted to go out moving and walk or something, but it was just gross. Which led me to find out my lug of a man can lay in bed all day doing nothing. I was going insane with the inactivity. I need to move. Sunday I tried to get him to go on a walk with me since it was GORGEOUS outside. Nope. He doesn’t do that. I’m seriously going to have to get this guy more active. If he’s going to hang with me, he needs to get off his butt and work out with me. He’s a little torn about it though; he worked out a lot when he was going through a really rough time in his life, so he associates gyms with that bad time. I associate only good things with working out—so its kind of hard to understand. He has said for over five months that he wants to start working out. As someone who has been dying to work out, and is slowly getting back into it, I just want to drag him along with me. Now we all know that will not work at all… you have to want to do it for yourself, so hopefully he’ll come around.

I finished my poster and getting ready for a conference on Sunday. So that’s off my to-do list. Well, almost. I have to edit the poster a bit to get everyone’s changes on it before tomorrow. Also – I’m going to a conference in DC starting next Saturday. I need to find healthy food near the convention center – any DC people have recommendations? Otherwise, my butt’s just going to be in Chinatown every day.

Thesis wise I’m doing well. I think I have about half of my literature review done. Its pretty extensive on some things, a little lighter on others… My paper from last week is being split into two separate chapters, one in vivo one in vitro – so I’m splitting it up and adding a bunch of figures no one but me and GraphPad care about to thicken up the thesis a bit. My goal is to have the in vivo chapter done tomorrow and work my butt to get the in vitro chapter done by Thursday afternoon. Well at least a rough draft of it. My boss is notorious for not reading anything, so I’m going to print him off a copy of the paper – with people’s suggestions if they ever send me them… and a rough draft of my thesis (hopefully a nice THICK stack of paper by then) – and hand it to him as he is getting ready to get on the airplane to DC. He’s going to have his wife and kids with him though, so he’ll probably use that as an excuse to not do anything next week. He was gone all last week, and won’t be back until tomorrow… so I don’t know when he is ever going to read it. Not that I expected him to, but still, he’ll probably try to blame me and say I didn’t give him a draft. *sigh*

SO that’s what I’ve been up to. Still trying to squeeze some fitness in. I just barely got 1000 fitness minutes last month; if it weren’t for that extra day I wouldn’t have!

Next month I should get up near there too. With all of the walking I’m going to be doing at this conference, I should rack up a ton of steps each day.

Upcoming stuff:
Conference 6th-10th
Fly home 10th – get in a car and drive to Milwaukee
11th – drive to Sheboygan, WI to meet some of TJ’s family
12th – drive to Green Bay for rehearsal dinner for the wedding TJ is in
13th – wedding of TJs friends
14th – drive back to StL
15th—drive back to Columbia
16th-19th – furiously try to finish thesis
19th – hand copies of thesis to committee members
19th-26th—work on paperwork and thesis presentation
26th—defend my thesis
27-28th—move out of my house
29th – close on my house
May
3rd – turn in thesis to grad school and drive to Milwaukee for another wedding
10th—turn in paperwork to grad school and my 28th birthday
17th – hopefully, graduation!
25th – wedding of my friend Mette

So yea… if I’m working out – you should be too!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHODGES83 4/2/2013 1:44PM

    Good Grief! You're superwoman!

Fingers crossed everything goes swimmingly!



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ATTACKFATCAT 4/2/2013 12:05PM

    You are one busy gal! Keep up that motivation to get your thesis done! I am a terrible procrastinator and end up working best under pressure, so I am not exactly a role model for getting stuff done on time, lol. I admire you and your schedule.

I do get where TJ is coming from based on past exes. After having both my ex-husband and the first boyfriend after my divorce cheat on me, I definitely had some trust issues going into my relationship with B. And it took a long time (probably about 8 months) and patience on B's part to work through those issues. I worked on it a lot myself, but we also ended up talking a LOT, even if I felt I was being irrational or silly. And I am grateful he was willing to help me through it. I think you are awesome for being so patient with the issues he's having.

That being said, you definitely had good reason to draw that line on the "marriage jokes." That is really not fair to you for him to freak out but then continue to say things like that. Keep drawing that to his attention...even if he doesn't realize he's saying it, if you continue to draw that line, he will eventually start to notice. In doing that, you can say it in a way that tries to deflate it and doesn't cause a fight. Like instead of accusing him, just ask him to not say it and explain how it makes you feel again. And stick with that line even if he tries to turn it into an argument. You don't have to defend your feelings or validate them. As long as you are making him aware of how it makes you feel...that's all you have to do.

I don't know how long you two have been together. But my therapist said something like it takes a maximum of 6 months for a person's true colors to show through (if they are hiding issues or the fact they are crazy). I understand if he has trust issues to work through, but if he is still waiting for you to turn "psycho" after even a year, then I would be a little concerned that he may never move past that concern. I think at that point, you need to make sure that the future you envision for yourself includes him, all the good parts and the bad. Can you be OK with someone who hates exercise? Can you accept that you may never get married?

I'm NOT saying break up with him. I think there is so much change going on in your life right now that it's a great idea to take marriage talk off the table until you figure out where you are going and what you are doing. Focus on you and getting your life where you want it. Then take stock of whether the relationships in your life are going to compliment you and where you want your life to be.

But take my unsolicited opinion with a grain of salt. My experiences don't equal everyone elses, lol.

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AHTRAP 4/1/2013 11:10PM

    Good job keeping on pace with the thesis writing, especially with all the distractions. Can't imagine doing a thousand mile road trip the week before something like that is due, more power to you getting that accomplished!

Almost making me feel guilty for being a lazy bum...


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BEECHNUT13 4/1/2013 10:58PM

    I have no room at all to talk (my over-three-years unemployed husband and all...), but it seems like you are super awesome responsible successful active woman, and your BF is kind of not. Now, this is judging from one blog post, so I may very well be completely off base. But - consider where you will be in five years, and where he will be, before considering putting talking about marriage on the table again. If you can't imagine marrying him, or he can't imagine marrying you (and thinks it's funny?) you might want to check out now rather than later. You are not getting any younger, or any less successful, so you may want to consider moving things along, lest you get stuck with a trophy husband.

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EMMYLOU010409 4/1/2013 10:45PM

    Get it! Holy cow! :)

I'd say you're handling the relationship well. Communication is important! Keep the dialogue open. And maybe, ah, associate some happier memories with working out for him, eh? :)

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