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    CAGEDBIRDSONG   20,269
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Becoming Opaque

Monday, April 01, 2013

I have to admit that one of my favorite perks to losing 90 pounds and finding health is becoming opaque.

When you weigh 300+ pounds you are invisible. Did you know that? People may stare at you when you walk away, but they never look you in the eye. I recognize part of the problem was my fault. I didn't want to look at them either. Didn't want to see disgust. Didn't want to see them quickly turn their heads before I caught their eye.

Now I look at everyone. I look them in the eye and stand proud. Not all the time, but most of the time, they will look back at me and return my smile.

Invisibility is a lonely way of life folks. If you are invisible, remember that there IS a cure.

I know we can, and should, be self confident at any weight. But most of us who have suffered alone in our extreme morbid obesity know the truth. Self confidence is ever elusive until you begin to live the life that makes you feel good about yourself.

Today, I am proudly opaque. Do you see me?

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SIMONEKP 4/4/2013 9:18AM

    I see you. Sometimes it's not others, it's the image you project, sometimes other people are jerks- all of this happens at any weight.

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AWOOD1973 4/4/2013 3:32AM

    Love this! Glad you are Opaque, but we all see you for the hard work you have put forth!

You should be very proud of all the accomplishments that you have made, up to this point, in your journey! There will be many more to follow! :)

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HFAYE81 4/3/2013 3:01PM

    I know exactly what you mean!!! I'm proud to be opaque!!! emoticon

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67YKCEB 4/3/2013 2:33PM

    This is something that we all need to hear. And not just the ones that have 100+ to lose. We all, well a lot of us, have the same insecurities. Being over looked, not talked to, not pretty enough. Then we have those wonderful voices in our heads telling us that we aren't good enough, or that they are laughing at us because of what ever.
Just like EMMACORY said that we all created in God's image. And we all deserve to be seen.
I know that I am just as guilty of not seeing and not being seen because of my actions. - looking away before I see their disgust on their face that I think will be there. I don't give them a chance.
................... thank you for opening my eyes to what I have been doing .......................
~their weight doesn't disgust me, it's my weight, my looks, my clothes that disgust me, and makes me look away.~

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BRADMILL2922 4/3/2013 2:24PM

    That is really true! Thanks for bringing light to it because it isn't something we like to think about but sometimes the truth isn't the easiest thing to take. We do know the truth and thanks for sharing!

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MSEMBERSTORM 4/2/2013 10:21PM

    Wow. This is so powerful!!!

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QUERIDAANA 4/2/2013 10:49AM

    Wonderful post well expressed. I see you and hear you. emoticon

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ATTACKFATCAT 4/2/2013 10:38AM

    I LOVE this and I know what you mean! When you are struggling with insecurity and don't want to draw attention to yourself, you always wind up keeping your head down and your shoulders slumped. I've noticed as I've become more confident and lost a lot of weight, I am standing taller and actually making eye contact. It's all about knowing your worth!

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GAIIAGIIRL 4/2/2013 10:32AM

    Great message

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I certainly hear you. And see you. Crystal-clear. I'm glad you are looking back.

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HAPPYERIN 4/2/2013 10:26AM

    Great blog! It is true -- not only does weight loss boost your confidence so that you can stand proudly, but you get noticed in a different way. Sad that things are that way, but awesome that you have gained this awesome perk! And it will only get better!!

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LISAMG1220 4/2/2013 9:31AM

    I understand what you mean. I noticed that people started engaging me in conversation more and looking me in the eye. I mentioned something to my Mom about it and she said it is not them it is you. You have changed for the better and are more confident. I like being opaque too. :)

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LULUBELLE65 4/2/2013 8:59AM

    Good for you! I think I have the opposite problem. I am 5'9, have red hair, and am pretty noticeable everywhere I go. (probably something to do with living in South Asia where everyone is short and brown, and West Africa, where almost everyone is tall like me, but dark skinned instead of pasty white.) I dream about not standing out. Of not having people notice me.

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JENNCABA 4/2/2013 12:23AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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EMMACORY 4/1/2013 10:03PM

    Everyone deserves to be seen.. We are created in God's image. All that God created is good. So I rejoice with you in feeling visible. emoticon emoticon

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PRETTYPITHY 4/1/2013 7:29PM

    This is very sweet. emoticon I'm happy for you!

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PIXIESPARK1 4/1/2013 7:24PM

  I do see you, opaque and colorful. You really know how to put the words on emotions.

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MYBULLDOGS 4/1/2013 7:18PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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