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    CHICCHANTAL   22,864
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The perils of alcohol

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Monday, April 01, 2013

On Saturday evening I had 11 nice bottles of wine delivered to my door. I had been along to the bottle shop and picked them out two weeks previously, then managed to forget they were being delivered so when at length I remembered I was due a delivery I phoned the shop and rearranged the delivery. My memory is not what it was, as you will see.

I took the 12th bottle home with me to have something to drink that evening, and then didn't feel like it so didn't open it till Friday just gone. I poured a glass, drank it, poured another glass, only drank half and put the rest of the glass in the fridge, and the rest of the bottle in the fridge.

By Saturday evening I'd forgotten (again) that the wine was being delivered but fortunately I was in the sitting room when the guy came round so there was no chance of missing it again.

You're already thinking that perhaps I drink too much wine anyway, aren't you?

So I took the delivery and put the 11 bottles in the wine rack where it always looks so nice and admired it.



Yesterday (Sunday), I was cooking seafood pasta for supper, and got the undrunk half glass of wine out of the fridge and poured it into the pan (waste not etc and I particularly can't waste wine).

This is where it gets complicated.

The thought then passed through my head that I'd like a nice glass of wine to drink. Chose a bottle of wine from the rack, poured wine, drank while cooking (it's one of the great truths in life that it helps if the cook is well lubricated).

A while later, I noticed that one of the bottles of wine in the rack was partly empty. I pulled it out of the rack, set it upright and glared at it.

Definitely about a glassful missing.

Humph I said to myself. Someone's been drinking my wine. The wine hadn't leaked out of the bottle, but there was definitely wine absent. It must have happened in the shop between me paying for the wine and delivery finally taking place. Humph. Too late at night to phone the shop (thank you, my Guardian Angel, for making it too late to phone the shop that evening) and complain about their staff swigging my wine out of the bottle.

I stomped off into the sitting room feeling quite grumpy, having first helped myself to a glass of wine from the open bottle in the fridge, and tried to decide what to do with the other opened bottle that someone else had been swigging from. I finished my glass of wine and decided I needed another glass of wine from the bottle in the fridge and that finished the bottle.

I stood in the kitchen staring at the empty bottle and thinking. 'OMG I've drunk an entire bottle of wine this evening. How come I'm not reeling?' Then my eye fell on the three-quarters full bottle. Pennies began to drop, slowly and boozily.

The person who'd pinched a glass of wine from the bottle in the rack . . . that was me, wasn't it? I'd tipped the half glass of wine from the fridge into my cooking and for some reason got it into my head that to have a drink, I'd need to open another bottle. I'd forgotten about the already open bottle of wine in the fridge. I had opened ANOTHER bottle of wine and then - and this is where it is really weird - put THAT bottle of wine back in the rack. I must have done this completely without thinking.

Autopilot? I wrote the book. Actually, I blame it on screw-caps. In the days when all wine had corks, you couldn't put the top back on so accidentally putting a bottle of wine back in the rack - not an option.

I'd then gone to the fridge - where I usually keep opened bottles of pink wine - for a second glass of wine and of course there was a nice chilled bottle waiting there for me, the original Friday night bottle, opened, still half full.

So I'd drunk that. THEN I'd noticed the bottle in the rack. So I'd only drunk three-quarters of a bottle of wine . . . Clearly this is enough to reduce my cognitive abilities but not enough to make me aware that this has happened. THAT only happens when I trip over a cat.

This blog was inspired by NEW-CAZ, who blogged about a senior moment this morning. I would like to say this wine episode was a senior moment.

However, it was a wine episode, wasn't it?

Bottoms up.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUPERSYLPH 8/2/2013 10:47AM

    Ha!

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EFFRAYECHILDE 4/26/2013 8:56AM

    emoticon

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WALKINGCHICK 4/22/2013 1:51PM

    Happens all the time to me and I don't drink! emoticon

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SANDYLH1 4/17/2013 7:40PM

  emoticon

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CINDYBEL 4/11/2013 10:11AM

    I do so enjoy reading your blogs. emoticon

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LISAREADS 4/11/2013 7:42AM

    Brings to mind a fave Dorothy Parker quote:
I like to have a martini,
two at the very most.
Three I'm under the table,
four I'm under my host.
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Cheers!

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KALEWINE 4/7/2013 2:21PM

    emoticon

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JGMARIE80 4/6/2013 5:00PM

  I enjoyed a good laugh. Cheers.

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CHUNKYMONKEY36 4/6/2013 4:49PM

    My sister in law and I once made shrimp scampi for the family while drinking wine. Needless to say we were a bit tipsy by the time we were ready to serve dinner. It dawned on us when we plated the shrimp that we forgot to cook the pasta!

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LEANMEAN2 4/6/2013 7:53AM

    Thanks for sharing.

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AMANDACOETZER 4/6/2013 7:31AM

    emoticon

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BKLYNDIVA 4/6/2013 12:51AM

    blame it on the alcohol!

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RUTGERSM0M 4/5/2013 10:17PM

    emoticon

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PORTIAWILLIS 4/5/2013 9:02PM

    At least you finally remembered. I used to have a problem similar to that. If I had more than 3 drinks my husband said the "shade come down".I was still walking and talking but would not remember anything the next day. Not the people I meet or what I might have said or done. Thank goodness I was a happy drunk and made lots of friends, even some I kept after I limited my drinking. Moral of this story I only have 2 drinks at a time now. Ha ha now I just have to get past the senior moments emoticon

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CJYOUCANDOIT 4/5/2013 2:26PM

    Sounds like a wine moment to me! emoticon

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CHARTHESTAR 4/4/2013 10:24PM

    I'm getting some of those senior moments now and then myself

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AMBER461 4/4/2013 9:03PM

  I am glad you remember before you call the store. We all have these senior moment. so don't think it is you alone. Keep on blogging I en joy your blogs.


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DFG5876 4/4/2013 3:29PM

    emoticon emoticon

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LBRAUN5 4/4/2013 3:26PM

  And that is why I only have one bottle at a time in my house! emoticon Glad you figured it out before you had the opportunity to call the shop. Plus, this really made me want a glass....

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1954MARG 4/4/2013 2:16PM

  I must try to stop wining so often, too! Thanks for the laugh.

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ORNERY1227 4/4/2013 1:54PM

  So I'm not the only one out there!!!! emoticon My question is how to keep enjoying my wine and still lose weight!!!! emoticon

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DMSGLASS 4/4/2013 1:15PM

    emoticon for the smile! emoticon

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DWEXCEL 4/4/2013 11:47AM

    LOL!!!!! Reminded me of me!

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SUESWONGER 4/4/2013 11:30AM

    Too Funny!! emoticon

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DNRAE1 4/4/2013 10:34AM

    Ah, wine moments, and senior moments......the joys of life! Enjoy!

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PENNYPACKER3 4/4/2013 10:02AM

    emoticon

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KNYAGENYA 4/4/2013 9:38AM

    whew!

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EBONYSOL 4/4/2013 8:23AM

    Glad you figured it out before "whining" to the shop. lol

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CFMOSS 4/4/2013 7:13AM

    Oh dear - typing while laughing is hard. Cheers.

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FAVORITEAUNT84 4/4/2013 1:03AM

    I'm still giggling about this one, 2 days later. Love your sense of humor.

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KHALIA2 4/4/2013 12:22AM

  A senior moment

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CM_GARDNER78 4/3/2013 11:54PM

    Oh my! HAHA!

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TRACYLYNN853 4/3/2013 10:27PM

    Ha!

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WINE4GIRL 4/3/2013 7:59PM

    I sit here enjoying a glass of Cab Sauv whilst enjoying your blog...
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AJB121299 4/3/2013 7:27PM

    nice

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KLONG8 4/3/2013 7:10PM

    I like the righteous indignation part.....

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TUBJUMPER 4/3/2013 6:43PM

    emoticon

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CUDDLYPOLARBEAR 4/3/2013 5:46PM

    Great post

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ELLELEANN 4/3/2013 3:43PM

    I love the screw cap theory. Cheers!
emoticon

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ANDYLIN90 4/3/2013 3:30PM

    emoticon I do enjoy wine occasionally, but I've had these "moments" even when I'm not drinking!

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3G1RLS4ME 4/3/2013 3:30PM

    Haha love it emoticon
I have a bottle of white moscato myself only drink red wine when making French onion soup with an entire bottle of red wine :)

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MINISANDY 4/3/2013 3:22PM

    Too funny!!

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IMOJANE 4/3/2013 3:21PM

    Hilarious. And thanks for the Dinner for One reference!!!

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OZARKMARY 4/3/2013 3:19PM

    Oh, how I enjoyed your blog!! Senior moments rule my world. I AM thinking of taking up wine drinking as it sounds like a lot of fun!! At least I'd have a good excuse for some of my shenanigans. Have a great rest of your week! emoticon emoticon

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EARLUTR 4/3/2013 3:08PM

  Sounds like something I would do! LOL

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SCRAPBECCA 4/3/2013 2:11PM

    Thanks for the afternoon chuckle! emoticon

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LORNE67 4/3/2013 2:08PM

    emoticon I sure enjoyed the good laugh!!

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BLONDIE218145 4/3/2013 12:53PM

    Me thinks my hubs suffers from this quite often!

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BRITTTURTLE 4/3/2013 12:35PM

  hahha

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JERICHO1991 4/3/2013 12:23PM

    A senior wine moment. Sounds like a good vintage.

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