Sunday, March 31, 2013
Sometimes, I would like to be one of those people who is always organized and lives up to commitments they have made to themselves and others; but I'm not - one of my most lamentable tragic flaws. This blog is a perfect example: I want to write every day, or at least every week. It doesn't happen. I try to never use the word "promise" because I've disappointed others and myself so many times.
My commitment to healthy eating is the latest casualty. I lost 80 pounds , gained back 30 and then lost 10. For some months, my weight was stable, but I can clearly see that it's creeping up. I cannot go back to where I was because I will die, but right now, I don't know where to look inside myself for the power to let go of my constant craving for sugar, ice cream, donuts - all markers when I fall into the worst case scenario. I don't know where to find, or how to access the power that is within me to help me heal myself.