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    CORTNEY-LEE   50,429
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Struggling a little today

Saturday, March 30, 2013

I am struggling a little (lot) bit today. Every other Friday my boyfriend and I go out to lunch. We have deemed it "Fast Food Friday" - of course I can make healthy choices. We usually go to Wendy's, Subway or the food court at the mall. At each place there is a sensible item that I can have

Wendy's - Small chili

Subway - 6in club on wheat - scoop out the bread, get rid of the bottom and eat it "open faced" which I usually only eat about half of it like that before I toss the bread all together

Mall Food Court - Teriyaki Chicken - no rice - extra veggies - they make it with all white meat chicken and no oil. It is a very good dish. Also the portion is nice sized and will give me at least 2 meals.

Today we went to Inlow's which is a local diner type place that specializes in 12 inch hot dogs and fried foods. I got a pizza cheesesteak and just ate the steak. I ditched the entire roll. It was a little greasy, and seemed very salty, but it sounded pretty good at the time. That set the tone for the entire day...

A co-worker lost a bet to me and in turn had to buy me lunch. We ordered from a Mom and Pop Pizza Shop, and I got a small chicken salad w/ house dressing (olive oil and red wine vinegar) It was very good. It comes with homemade bread, which I gave directly to my co-worker. I didn't eat it.

But then... one of my local drivers showed up. He is a delightful man who makes the most awesome homemade chocolate peanut butter Easter Eggs. He gave me one, and I couldn't resist. If I would have ate it all at once, I would have gotten sick, but I nibbled a little of it here and there, and before I knew it... I ate the whole thing! Then... my co-worker had Laffy Taffy. I have such a weakness for that... then I had a bite or two of a homemade nut roll... with yummy flaky pastry... I know this is unacceptable, but I couldn't seem to stop myself.

Everyone comes in with the... don't be hard on yourself, you work so hard, you deserve a treat... blah blah blah. What I really need is someone to say Hey fat a$$, do you really think you need that?

I have a family dinner tomorrow. My family cooks pretty healthy. There will be ham (yummy) scalloped potatoes (yuck) green bean casserole w/ cheese (super yummy) and I am not sure what else. I am going to have to be very careful. My mom is making Angel Food cake with fresh strawberries for desert. That is well within my limits, but I need to be careful.

I don't know why I am having such a hard time today... I don't know why I feel like an empty pit, but I need to get it figured out, because this behaviour can't continue.

I will face the music tomorrow and see what the scale says
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SOOTHINGGLOW 3/30/2013 3:57PM

    First off...I just need to say.... You my dear are definitely NOT a fat a$$. You are a beautiful woman! We all screw up. It's part of being human. You need to forgive yourself, get up, dust yourself off and embrace a new day! You can do it and I know you will. Look how far you've already come!
Happy Easter!
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PATTYR81 3/30/2013 12:38PM

    I'm with ya girlie!!

I'm struggling with the emotions of Easter and thinking of all my 'girls' who are with me only in spirit - My mom, my aunt and my 2 dd's in college. emoticon

oh yeah and without my old comfort: JUNK FOOD!

Hang in there~

Put on your new pretty dress, grab your new awesome handbag and have a great day!!!

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JIBBIE49 3/30/2013 11:02AM

    Hang in there, it is Easter and it is only once a year.

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CDCSMITH2013 3/30/2013 8:37AM

    As long as you stop now, refocus, try to limit your exposure to the can't resist foods for a bit, I think you'll be okay. But I know that is easier said than done. You can do it.

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SWEETYOUNGTHING 3/30/2013 8:12AM

    I haven't been very consistent myself lately. We all go through these spells. Whether you want to hear it or not, you have to lighten up on yourself. Calling yourself names isn't going to help.

Write things out - doodle - it's very therapeutic. Make a list of strategies - something to help clear your head.

Hey, yesterday I ate an ENTIRE bag of jelly beans. No clue why - that isn't like me at all. I'm a Vegan and knew they weren't Vegan friendly. No idea why I sabotaged myself.

But it's done and over with. Onward and upward, Pat

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MARYJOANNA 3/30/2013 5:55AM

  We all have our goofs once in a while. Don't beat yourself up over it. Just get back on track.

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COCK-ROBIN 3/30/2013 5:30AM

    Just watch portion sizes, and you'll be all right.

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LOVINGAFRICA 3/30/2013 3:50AM

    Don't continue on this trend, but cut out the guilt. Guilt is a VERY fattening trigger emotion, Girlfriend. As is being tired.
There is always your bike, to do some damage control.
Hang in there, it is Easter and it is only once a year, so don't sweat it to much.
Have fun at your parents'

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