Thursday, March 28, 2013
I thought I could keep dark chocolate in the house and not have a problem with it, but yesterday I ate more than I usually portion out, and in general I'm really fighting cravings again.
I thought I stayed in my calorie range yesterday, but after I went to bed, I remembered some extras that I ate after lunch and forgot to put on the tracker. Well, that's kinda sad because it ended a streak of 72 days tracking and staying in calorie range. No----correction----no sadness here! I'm going to feel TREMENDOUS that I tracked and stayed in range for 72 days. First time I have EVER done that....but not the last time! I have a new streak going, by the way.... a streak of one day, counting today!
Yesterday I went over by 230 calories. Doesn't sound that bad on paper, but for myself I KNOW I have been feeling binge-y for a couple days. I'm pretty sure yesterday was a binge-ette. I have been pretty aware and have stopped myself on several different days..... but it's still the feeling of standing on a precipice. Once recently I had the "on a cliff" image in my head, so I visualized myself walking away from a rocky danger spot. I also used the approach, "What would I tell a friend if she told me she feels like she's standing on a precipice, about to go over the edge?" I would say, "Walk away! You have the power to choose! Walk away!"
So it's time to take action. I know sugar is a trigger, and I've gotten sloppy. So I'm writing this for reference and accountability. No sugar for two weeks. Not even dark chocolate. I need to see if that can take me back to peaceful relations with food.
It's not that noble; I am not fond of Easter candy, and since I don't eat wheat now, this 2-week focus doesn't make me miss much that would interest me. Our oldest son's birthday is this weekend, but his chosen celebratory offering is cheesecake. I don't mind missing cheesecake. No biggie.
Sunday is Resurrection Day with a brunch at church, so I have to mentally prepare for that buffet. It happens after a joyful, uplifting service of worship and celebration, so that helps me be in a good frame of mind. Strategy: I'm thinking about having my teen daughter fix my plate and bring it to the table, so I don't even go through the line myself. Right now I feel too vulnerable. She eats healthy and has studied nutrition this year with me, so she'll know what to bring me.
Getting back to the title from this long beat-around-the-bush....I packaged up the 72% cacao dark chocolate bars and the Trail Mix with dark morsels and the Rollo....!!!!....why are Rollo candies in my pantry?.....and put them where I won't see them. When my daughter gets home from work, I'll have her hide them so she and her sister can have them, but I won't have any temptation. My husband has no interest in chocolate. Can you imagine? I can't. Also we have another son, my flesh and bone, who just never cared for chocolate. How does that happen?