Thursday, March 28, 2013
So, everyone who knows me, knows the drama with mom and her health. Anyone who doesn't and wants to be bored into a coma, feel free to read past blogs (aka rants-about mom, my teen, wisconsin snow, my son's chihuahua, life in general, lol) to catch up.
She called me earlier tonight (while I was trying to get a massive migraine under control-ugh) to try to get sympathy from me because my sister had just caught her outside at the nursing home smoking a cigarette?!!
Okay. Here is how it went. My sister told her she was busted. I chewed her out. Mom says "I knew I shouldn't have told you"
Me: Friday night you told me you were going to quit, you were still in the hospital and didn't have the choice to smoke, but wanted me to tell you how proud I was of you. Now as soon as you are released from the hospital, it didn't even take you 24 hours to sneak a smoke?!
Mom: One of the nurses offered, and it was only one...
Just for the record, there were a TON of nasty retorts running through my head, all of them begging to jump out of my mouth-like what the hell was that nurse thinking?!?-but I behaved myself.
Me: According to you, that's all you've BEEN smoking for months now. So what makes today any different than any other day that you haven't quit??
Mom: I know your sister is going to come yell at me, I didn't think you would.
In all fairness to me, I was dealing with a MASSIVE MIGRAINE in addition to a whiney mother. If I would have yelled, my brain would have exploded. Therefore, I was NOT yelling at her. I was chewing her out. There's a difference.
Me: Mother, what have they been telling you? You have COPD and freaking heart failure! Your heart and lungs can't take this crap any more.
Mom: It was only one, and as soon as my kidneys are better, they're going to do the stents to fix my heart...
I'm thinking Woman, don't EVEN get me started on that whole thing again.
Me: Yeah, and then what? You're going to go back to doing what you da#* well please? When is that happening, anyway?
Mom: my kidneys are getting better since the kidney doctor took me off half my meds. Don't say it.
Me: don't say what? I didn't say a THING.
Mom: I know you were going to say something about my doctor.
Me: No, I wasn't. You know what I would say, so I don't have to say it. You can hear dad's voice in your head saying the same things, can't you?
Mom: well, I guess I should let you go take care of your migraine before your sister comes to yell at me.
Me: tell her I chewed you out too. That way she knows I'm not letting you play one of us against the other again. I love you.
Mom: I love you too. even though you're yelling at me.
Really? You call me to brag that you've broken your word-again. You want sympathy for doing something stupid. Don't play the addiction card, she was in the hospital long enough the addiction was gone. You are trying to start trouble between me and my sister again.
And the last thing you say before you hang up is a lie?
This would be the reason why I live as far away as I do. And why I don't call more often. And why it really doesn't bother me to let my sister deal with her.
Is it any wonder I have self-image issues? Yikes! I need to start getting out of my house and away from the phone more. Be too busy for the drama. I will make time when/if she really, honestly needs me. But it took me too many years of hard work to get to where I am, I am not going to let her drag me down with her.
My dad would approve.