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    PIXIE-LICIOUS   132,466
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Being Honest

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Wednesday, March 27, 2013




Today is day 36 of my current streak!

I was thinking today about how different my life has become since I started my first streak last year. Back then, exercise was SO not important to me. I belonged to a women's gym, and although I went there on a regular basis, I never pushed myself at all during my workouts. I just did the circuit at a lazy pace, chatting with the other women there and not doing a darned thing to break a sweat or get my heart rate up. And I would think "oh, I'm working out, I'm in pretty good shape for how fat I am!"

Isn't it amazing the things we can convince ourselves of, and the lies we can tell ourselves? I honestly had myself believing that I was fit and healthy, even though I weighed 286 lbs, binged on junk food in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep, and didn't even WORK my workouts!

But yet, for all the lies I told myself, there was no way I could ignore the fact that I would get out of breath just from walking across the room, or the way my whole body hurt, or the way I had no energy for living my life. So once again, I lied to myself. I'd tell myself that my knees hurt so much from working out, and that the reason I was out of breath so easily was because of my blood pressure medication.



When I started my streak, I knew I had to be completely honest with myself, or as close to it as possible. It was time to admit...my knees hurt because I weighed so much! I was out of breath and had no energy because, aside from that half hour at the women's gym, I spent the rest of the day sitting (or laying) around watching TV or Sparking!

Once I started being honest with myself, things started to change. I quit the women's gym, and I started working out at home. I stopped buying junk food, hiding it in my purse, and then eating it at 2 in the morning in a dark kitchen. I bought healthy food, and I started tracking it like it was my mission in life.



It was not easy, and its still not easy. I struggled in the beginning, and I struggle to this day, but thats okay. Before I started streaking last year, I struggled just to MOVE and BREATHE. Now I struggle to IMPROVE a little every day.

My streaks aren't perfect. I have had to start over a few times, but I'm proud of starting over because that means I didn't quit! I have had huge successes and also huge failures, but I've kept going and I've made progress. I'm not at my goal size yet, but I know I will get there if I keep pushing myself. In the meantime, I've had a multitude of non-scale victories to celebrate. I've gotten smaller, stronger, healthier and I have learned to love my perfectly imperfect body. I have learned that taking care of my health is the most loving thing I can do for my family.



When I workout now, I strive to push myself hard. I actually LOVE to break a sweat and get that heart rate up. I love the exhilarating exhaustion that comes from a true workout. I never look for the easy way out anymore. I like a workout that challenges me, and then when I get good at it and it feels easier, I move on to something else.

I still love my DDP Yoga workouts because they still challenge the heck out of me! Recently, I've also started doing kettlebell workouts with this DVD;

www.youtube.com/watch?v=
FTm10O_B_rY


Slowly but surely, I am getting closer and closer to my goal. In the meantime, I am discovering that I am capable of so much more than I ever would have believed, and I look forward to discovering even more about myself.




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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ABUFFKIN 3/28/2013 8:39AM

    Thanks so much for continuing to share your journey. Your blog posts continue to encourage and inspire me. emoticon emoticon

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STHOMAS1009 3/28/2013 8:27AM

    Thank you for this! I am where you were, but want to be where you are!

You do rock! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BRENDA_G50 3/28/2013 8:20AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JANEMARIE77 3/28/2013 8:13AM

    rocking it small steps at a time

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DIANNEMT 3/28/2013 8:00AM

    Glad you have seen what you need to do for YOU.

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SANDYCRANE 3/28/2013 7:54AM

    You can do it Pixie. Just do not give up. You inspire us all.

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BESSHAILE 3/28/2013 7:21AM

    You do rock. and it's the honesty thing that made it happen. In the end, change makes us look deep into ourselves and decide who we really are.

And like Zaphod Beeblebrox in Hitchhiker's Guide - you're a pretty neat gal.

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WATERDIAMONDS 3/28/2013 7:18AM

    "Now I struggle to IMPROVE a little every day."

What a GREAT idea for a mantra!

Thank you, as always.

YOU = emoticon

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PENOWOK 3/28/2013 7:04AM

    You have come a long way, baby and there's so much more good on the way!!

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PANIK257 3/28/2013 6:20AM

    Honesty has defeated me a few times. I can relate.

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NCSUE0514 3/28/2013 6:17AM

    Keep up the good work!

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LIFETIMER54 3/28/2013 6:07AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TRYINGHARD54 3/28/2013 5:42AM

    emoticon

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NASFKAB 3/28/2013 5:18AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SHERYLDS 3/28/2013 4:52AM

    emoticon that really spoke to me....I need to work harder

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BLUENOSE63 3/28/2013 4:40AM

  Excellent blog Pixie! Love the yoga bunnies

Keep up the great work.

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GBSLIM 3/28/2013 4:35AM

    Glad you're back to "workin' it" :)
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REGILIEH 3/28/2013 3:39AM

    emoticon emoticon

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123ELAINE456 3/28/2013 1:55AM

  Awesome Blog as usual. Love It. Very Inspiring. You are doing Great. God Blessings to Everyone. Havs an Enjoyable Day. Take Care. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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DRB13_1 3/28/2013 1:42AM

    I love your blogs...
you find the greatest pictures, too
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon YOU ROCK!

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COCK-ROBIN 3/28/2013 1:21AM

    And you do rock, Pixie!

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FISHER011 3/28/2013 1:19AM

    You are so awesome Pixie! Great blog! emoticon

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GOING-STRONG 3/28/2013 12:42AM

    Dear Pixie.... YOU rock!

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TONYTHETSANGEL 3/28/2013 12:28AM

    Good blog Pixie! emoticon emoticon

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MICKEYH 3/28/2013 12:28AM

    Thank you for sharing this great encouragement blog!! You are really Rocks Pixie!!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KATHYJO56 3/28/2013 12:21AM

    You rock! emoticon

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SASSYTHING52 3/28/2013 12:01AM

    emoticon

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JCDUBEA63 3/27/2013 10:57PM

    emoticon

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BHEALTHY4ME1 3/27/2013 10:46PM

  Hi Pixie! I struggle with honesty also. I will turn 50 this year & have set a reasonable goal weight for that special day. But because it is so far away, I rationalize that I don't really need to buckle down & be serious just yet. Would it be so bad if I reached my goal early? I struggle to stay on track every day, yet I will be VERY disappointed if I don't make goal. Thank you for your words of inspiration. It's nice to know others are doing this and it is ACHIEVABLE. emoticon

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GEMLADYONE 3/27/2013 10:31PM

    You're doing great! It's all about progress not perfection!

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-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 3/27/2013 10:17PM

    emoticon emoticon

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LAINIESNEWLIFE 3/27/2013 9:41PM

    Another awesome blog, Pixie!!! I'm so proud of you!!!

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MANDELOVICH 3/27/2013 9:30PM

    You rock Pixie!!

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PHOENIX1949 3/27/2013 9:29PM

    Rock on! Great blog.

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KRISSYDUNN 3/27/2013 9:28PM

    As I was reading your blog about pushing yourself it occurred to me I could get off my butt and do that dance-walk exercise video I have. So I did! I put you on hold and did my workout. Thanks for another great inspiring blog! emoticon emoticon

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WEGENERCS 3/27/2013 9:25PM

    Indeed you do!

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SIMONEKP 3/27/2013 9:20PM

    you rock!

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MATTEROFHEART 3/27/2013 9:16PM

    Pixie, thank you for being so transparent with us. Because of your honesty, we can learn from you and know that things aren't always going to be perfect and that is perfectly ok. I love the saying, "your struggles are a part of your success story". That totally changes how we can look at our struggles! If we expect them, we can accept them and move on! That is so freeing!!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!

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WATERMELLEN 3/27/2013 9:01PM

    Great blog: I "liked" it and I'd like to print it out and post it at my gym!

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1CRAZYDOG 3/27/2013 8:54PM

    Awesome blog about the power of turning thinking honest and positive! You DO rock! HUGS

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ALIWVU121 3/27/2013 8:34PM

    This post could have been from me! I used to do the same thing when it came to the gym.

Keep up the great work though and have a healthy, happy weekend!

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GARDENSFORLIFE 3/27/2013 8:26PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LJR4HEALTH 3/27/2013 8:25PM

    Pixie you do rock

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KARRENLYNN 3/27/2013 8:20PM

    You Rock Pixie!! You have every right to be so proud of your accomplishments and for getting back on track when you stumble.


Have a great day!

Karen

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MSMOSTIMPROVED 3/27/2013 8:19PM

    High Five Pixie-Licious! You totally rock and your success continues to be an inspiration. It's amazing what you can do when you put your miind to it.

Focus Pocus and continued success!

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MARITIMER3 3/27/2013 8:19PM

    Thank you for your honesty, Pixie. We've all made excuses; we've all justified things that we've done (or not done!), but SP teaches us to look in the mirror and really see ourselves.

You're doing great!
Gail

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MSROZZIE 3/27/2013 8:17PM

    emoticon emoticon I enjoyed your blog and motivation posters! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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IAMTOLOSE 3/27/2013 8:17PM

    You are so inspiring.

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LITTLE_QUEEN 3/27/2013 8:16PM

    emoticon

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4RASCALS 3/27/2013 8:15PM

    Pixie your doing awesome. Your a real inspiration to all. When you get side tracked, you pick yourself up and start again. It takes courage to keep pushing and to be honest with yourself.

I learn so much from you ... Thank you

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