Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.


    PIXIE-LICIOUS   132,377
SparkPoints
100,000 or more SparkPoints
 
 
Being Honest

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Wednesday, March 27, 2013




Today is day 36 of my current streak!

I was thinking today about how different my life has become since I started my first streak last year. Back then, exercise was SO not important to me. I belonged to a women's gym, and although I went there on a regular basis, I never pushed myself at all during my workouts. I just did the circuit at a lazy pace, chatting with the other women there and not doing a darned thing to break a sweat or get my heart rate up. And I would think "oh, I'm working out, I'm in pretty good shape for how fat I am!"

Isn't it amazing the things we can convince ourselves of, and the lies we can tell ourselves? I honestly had myself believing that I was fit and healthy, even though I weighed 286 lbs, binged on junk food in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep, and didn't even WORK my workouts!

But yet, for all the lies I told myself, there was no way I could ignore the fact that I would get out of breath just from walking across the room, or the way my whole body hurt, or the way I had no energy for living my life. So once again, I lied to myself. I'd tell myself that my knees hurt so much from working out, and that the reason I was out of breath so easily was because of my blood pressure medication.



When I started my streak, I knew I had to be completely honest with myself, or as close to it as possible. It was time to admit...my knees hurt because I weighed so much! I was out of breath and had no energy because, aside from that half hour at the women's gym, I spent the rest of the day sitting (or laying) around watching TV or Sparking!

Once I started being honest with myself, things started to change. I quit the women's gym, and I started working out at home. I stopped buying junk food, hiding it in my purse, and then eating it at 2 in the morning in a dark kitchen. I bought healthy food, and I started tracking it like it was my mission in life.



It was not easy, and its still not easy. I struggled in the beginning, and I struggle to this day, but thats okay. Before I started streaking last year, I struggled just to MOVE and BREATHE. Now I struggle to IMPROVE a little every day.

My streaks aren't perfect. I have had to start over a few times, but I'm proud of starting over because that means I didn't quit! I have had huge successes and also huge failures, but I've kept going and I've made progress. I'm not at my goal size yet, but I know I will get there if I keep pushing myself. In the meantime, I've had a multitude of non-scale victories to celebrate. I've gotten smaller, stronger, healthier and I have learned to love my perfectly imperfect body. I have learned that taking care of my health is the most loving thing I can do for my family.



When I workout now, I strive to push myself hard. I actually LOVE to break a sweat and get that heart rate up. I love the exhilarating exhaustion that comes from a true workout. I never look for the easy way out anymore. I like a workout that challenges me, and then when I get good at it and it feels easier, I move on to something else.

I still love my DDP Yoga workouts because they still challenge the heck out of me! Recently, I've also started doing kettlebell workouts with this DVD;

www.youtube.com/watch?v=
FTm10O_B_rY


Slowly but surely, I am getting closer and closer to my goal. In the meantime, I am discovering that I am capable of so much more than I ever would have believed, and I look forward to discovering even more about myself.




SHARE
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WENDYANNE61 3/29/2013 10:47AM

    Have a Happy Easter, Pixie! I love reading about how far you have come! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FARIS71 3/29/2013 10:45AM

    What an uplifting blog! THank you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
AJB121299 3/29/2013 10:22AM

    Great blog

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOSER05 3/29/2013 9:43AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SPARTAN40 3/29/2013 9:21AM

    I love the Brett Hoebel quote!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DUSTYPRAIRIE 3/29/2013 9:19AM

    Another one that inspires!

Report Inappropriate Comment
RDEE22 3/29/2013 8:43AM

    Another good one Pixie. You always tell it like it is. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRIANGLE-WOMAN 3/29/2013 7:37AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LIFETIMER54 3/29/2013 6:46AM

  emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MUSOLF6 3/29/2013 6:08AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIMDEB 3/29/2013 2:38AM

  Happy Easter weekend!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHERIRIDDELL 3/29/2013 1:56AM

    Awesome!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JAMER123 3/28/2013 11:50PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CLAYARTIST 3/28/2013 11:50PM

  emoticon m emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CORNERKICK 3/28/2013 11:33PM

  emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JOANNHUNT 3/28/2013 10:37PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GOOSIEMOON 3/28/2013 10:07PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEARTS116 3/28/2013 9:34PM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALIDOSHA 3/28/2013 5:27PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LINDAK25 3/28/2013 5:15PM

    I love your Easter background pictures.

I've found it helps to build your self-esteem when you respect yourself enough to be honest with yourself. It's not always easy to do, though.

Report Inappropriate Comment
IAMAGEMLOVER 3/28/2013 4:06PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon Great blog. You are inspiring.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JEANNETTE59 3/28/2013 4:05PM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEORGE815 3/28/2013 3:57PM

    Good luck!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LIVELYGIRL2 3/28/2013 3:55PM

  I love that Brett Hoebel quote.YES emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUGAR0814 3/28/2013 2:37PM

    Another great blog! Thanks for sharing Pixie! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WENDYSPARKS 3/28/2013 2:24PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CJYOUCANDOIT 3/28/2013 2:24PM

    Honesty with myself!!!! What a great idea. You are so right. It is way too easy to delude ourselves into thinking we are doing it right when we are not. I am especially guilty when it comes to tracking. Thank you for the wake up call on this. You are so inspirational for me.
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMMY445 3/28/2013 2:23PM

    so awesome! have a fabulous day!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BAMAJAM 3/28/2013 1:47PM

  .... "taking care of my health is the most loving thing I can do for my family"

AMEN TO THIS QUOTE---- THANKS, PIXIE!!

---- I need to get off the fence and start "working" on my goals. You inspire me!

HAPPY EASTER TO ALL--

Report Inappropriate Comment
STAY39 3/28/2013 1:26PM

    You are an inspiration!!! I hope to have my mom read about your journey someday- when's she's ready to be honest!! Thank you for sharing your awesome story! Keep up the great work! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JANESLOSS 3/28/2013 12:48PM

    emoticon

You do ROCK!



Report Inappropriate Comment
CHANGING-TURTLE 3/28/2013 12:42PM

    Great blog you always inspire me to do better then i have been doing. You know what you just inspired me to go for another walk right now!!!! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CICELY360 3/28/2013 11:39AM

  good blog

Report Inappropriate Comment
PATRICIAANN46 3/28/2013 11:38AM

  You are the emoticon emoticon for your continued encouragement.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CEEMAY 3/28/2013 11:29AM

    Once again you are totally and completely emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FUNLOVEN 3/28/2013 11:16AM

    Pixie - Your the one that ROCKS !
Love following your blogs.
Thanks for all you do for us emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROCKYCPA 3/28/2013 10:21AM

    Great blog - thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
WORKNPROGRESS49 3/28/2013 10:07AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KICKINGKILOS 3/28/2013 10:03AM

    you know I dreamt about your blog...really. I dreamt that I am reading your blog, and then we skyped..LOL

Great blog Pixie! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSGETTENBY42 3/28/2013 9:59AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SLIMLEAF 3/28/2013 9:58AM

    emoticon

Keep up the good work, Pixie!

Report Inappropriate Comment
VICKI-B- 3/28/2013 9:53AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SNOWYOGA 3/28/2013 9:48AM

    emoticon Great blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
EVELYN112011 3/28/2013 9:38AM

    emoticon blog!

emoticon I needed this today! You are so inspiring!

You are emoticon

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DJSHIP46 3/28/2013 9:27AM

    Oh wow!!! I can certainly relate to a lot of your story. You're doing so much better than I am and I am really inspired by your spunk!!! Thank you for sharing your journey. Time for me to get up and try again!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GINGER_BEAR 3/28/2013 9:27AM

    You ROCK Pixie!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JOYFULGRATITUDE 3/28/2013 9:22AM

    Rock on Pixie! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMOSG 3/28/2013 9:20AM

    Another great blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEPTUNE1939 3/28/2013 9:12AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANNASGOALS 3/28/2013 9:09AM

    You totally ROCK Pixie! Thank you for another great blog. Your my inspiration not to give in or give up!

Be Fierce! my friend!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post


Log in to post a comment.
Member Comments Page (156 total):  < Previous 1 2 3 4 Next >
 


Other Entries by PIXIE-LICIOUS