Wednesday, March 27, 2013
I'm happy to report that yesterday I made it through the day without bingeing. I had that one incident yesterday that I wrote about where I started to, but managed to stop myself, and that was it.
Today I also overate and then started to binge, but again managed to stop myself by positive self talk and thinking about the long-term rather than the immediate discomfort and urge. It was an accident that I was by myself with a whole bag full of fresh bagels (haha if you've read my past entries you know about my love-hate relationship with bagels). It almost turned ugly, but I got myself to stop at 3. If I had continued on I would have finished the bag and then probably continued on to whatever else was around.
Anyway, I think the main thought that helped me today was the idea that "success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out". Maybe that will resonate with someone today, so I thought I'd share it.
+ When I first started overeating, I noticed my breath was getting really shallow and kind of panicky, so I deliberately took deep breathes and focused on my breathing...I thought of why I practice yoga and how I want to take that practice off the mat and into life, and also of the recent feedback from my blog comments, even though I didn't have a computer with me (thank you Spark Friends!).
+ I realized I felt kind of scared of change, even though it's a change I desperately want to make. I'm not really sure if I think one thing or another about this, but I think it's a good thing that I noticed it.
+ I noticed the black and white thought "you already overate, you might as well just give up and binge and finish this off since you already started" but countered it, telling myself that change is going to be small and gradual. I reminded myself that I will see results and feel more confident even if I am just overeating, rather than bingeing. There is a difference, and I have to practice not bingeing.
+ Even though it was interrupted by this overeating incident, I did get some studying done. I also planned ahead to keep myself out of the house so there would be less to possibly binge on (even though it turned out that the bagels got bought while we were out since it was convenient, but this wasn't intended...I intended to buy them later).
Ok, that's all for now. I hope I can keep up my resolve for the rest of the day. Best wishes to my Spark Friends out there!