Wednesday, March 27, 2013
I feel really good today, so blessed and so fortunate to be exactly where I am.
I got up this morning, and did my strength training and then got back to the Deepak Chopra/Oprah Winfrey meditation series that I started but neglected while I was in Florida. I really like meditating every morning, it calms me and strengthens me for the day.
In each of the meditations, there is a mantra, and my favorite one so far is "Om Anahndam Namah" which means, "My actions are blissfully free from attachment to outcome." To me, this means that although I choose my actions based on what I think is good and right, I know that I can't determine the outcome of those actions and thatís alright. This is especially important when it involves others, because really, all I can control is myself. When I started doing that meditation, I was kind of upset, depressed even, but I couldnít exactly figure out why. Then I did the meditation. And after the meditation I realized I was upset about some people I love and care about that I felt hadnít treated me the way I wanted to be treated. I think I was feeling bad about myself, that I spent my time loving them. Why was I loving people who were not, in my estimation, being good to me? Was there something wrong with me? The meditation made me realize that there was nothing wrong with me, that I chose to give that love and beyond that, I have no control. Now, perhaps in the future, I will choose to spend my time and energy differently, but if I give my love freely and it is my choice, the outcome doesnít diminish me.
That happened last week. And somehow it lifted the cloud of depression that had settled over me, and blew it away.
Now, even though itís still chilly here Ė it was actually snowing on Monday -- I feel like Spring is just around the corner. I feel like Iím ready to move into a new phase of my life, when I will be better able to use my creativity for positive change. Between the painting class I took and the work I did with a coach to prepare for the job interviews, I realized that my creativity is what drives me, and the more I can use it in all the parts of my life, the happier I will be. So, I plan to focus on giving my creativity room to blossom during the month of April, by trying to make sure that I take the time to paint, by trying to use my creativity in my work (not always easy!), and by beautifying my home. And of course look for new ways to work out and to eat healthy and delicious food. Iíll be looking for ways to make creativity bloom in every area of my life!
So, the theme for this month is blossoming, along with all the Spring flowers that I canít wait to see! Wishing a wonderful Spring and a blossoming of happiness to all my friends!