Monday, March 25, 2013
I tracked again today and I HATE having to be honest! But this is the one thing that is successful. And now I am stewing: to weigh in or not to weigh in tomorrow? If I am up in pounds, I have only myself and a week off from honesty to blame. If I don't weigh in because I am afraid of seeing that number go up, I am being ruled by the scale. On the other hand, I've had a couple of days of good hard workouts, so maybe, just maybe, I am not as up as I fear.
I think I will try weighing in, because after all, that's the one number that I am keeping track of, and try to remain philosophical about the results. HAH. Good luck with that one. So hard to not get depressed when we see that we might not achieve our goals exactly on the little schedule we have predetermined for ourselves! Silly! Because what is this goal about, really? Is it about health, or happiness, or being a good example for the little fellas? No, it's about my fervent desire to look a certain way on the beach in, lets see, 75 days.
Ultimately, when faced with the cheese filled pastry of my partners people (Armenian burek--butter is a chief ingredient), the question doesn't come down to me remembering that I want to be healthy or that I want to look fit (okay, ripped would be great). The question becomes, how much of this can I get away with eating?
That, my Spark Friends, is why tracking is the hardest part. Because having to be honest about the cheese pie makes me feel ashamed and a little gross. No one wants to watch a chubby girl stuff herself! Eeesh. And listen to that self-talk. Disaster!
Okay let's turn this around: I accept myself unconditionally, as I am RIGHT NOW.
and my student creed from my dojo:
I intend to develop myself in a positive manner and to avoid anything that could reduce my mental growth or physical health.
I intend to develop SELF DISCIPLINE, in order to bring out the best in myself and others.
I intend to use what I learn in class constructively and defensively, to benefit myself and my fellow human beings, and never to be abusive or offensive.
For the third statement, you could replace "in class" with "on Spark People", and you would pretty much have it right. And to remember not to be abusive or offensive--to ourselves.