It has only been a few short days since my last blog, but things are looking up! Things aren't back up to the standards of
's, but of course that will take some time.
TMI Alert: I really think PMS had made everything worse the last couple of days. My emotions were real, but I really think they were at the extreme because of the hormones.
In the past few days I have gained control of my eating, implemented a new eating plan, but I am only using it as a guideline and am adding in things and doing what I need to do to meet my own calorie requirements.
I've kept up the exercise, but I almost feel like I'm getting my groove back for WANTING to exercise, ALMOST.
I am in the process of "letting the boy go"... it is harder than I thought but it would have been harder to do it later on. He knows I am done but I guess in some ways I am still mourning that loss a bit.
There is a new boy as seen in my status updates lol, I met him on a dating site and was a little reluctant to meet him because meeting new people like that causes me a lot of anxiety... But I don't continue to talk to people if I don't think they are genuinely nice guys, and while some slip through the cracks, the fact that he made it to the meeting stage speaks volumes.
We went out on Friday and we were just supposed to have a quick coffee date, but he ended up taking me to dinner and he paid which was very sweet. YES, at the age of 27, that is the FIRST time I have had someone buy me dinner.
I had one other guy offer but when I said "are you sure, I can pay my half" he said okay and looked relieved LOL. I said the same to "new boy" but he said "No, I'm sure, I want to." So that was very nice. He was very polite, he opened all the doors for me, he walked me all the way back to my car which was way farther than his. When we said goodbye he asked if I wanted to do it again. He then texted me when he got home and said he had fun then told me it was the "best date he's been on so far". He texted me Saturday, and even told me good night when he went to bed. He wanted to see me today (asked yesterday) but I couldn't because of my work schedule. Yesterday he also told me I was pretty.
I can't remember the last time a boy told me I was pretty... He talked to me today and told me goodnight...
I begged "the boy" (the original) to text me good night because in his line of work it is a dangerous job if you get where I'm going with that, and so that I would know he was okay and made it home safely, but he wouldn't do it. Just in the matter of 3 days this new boy has treated me so much better than I have ever been treated. I am not one to get super excited about a new person very quickly, but I am trying to give this guy a very fair chance. It is a twisted emotion because while I am happy he is treating me so well, it is also very depressing to see just how poorly "the boy" was treating me the past 6 months. It is a lot to take in, but I am working on it.
All in all, I am glad to be doing well with my food and trying to just work on being my happy self again. I bloated my way up to about 215 and the scale is finally coming back down so I hope to see 209 again soon and onward to Onederland. Yeah yeah, I know, I've been wanting to reach Onederland since October, but I still keep wishing and pushing, one day it'll all come together.