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    BE-THE-CHANGE   111,960
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Positivity

Sunday, March 24, 2013

I subscribe to something called the Positivity Blog. Most days I just look at the email quickly before I discard it but I held onto Friday's for some reason and I really need to read it today.

It was titled "3 Things to STOP Doing for Happiness and High Self-Esteem" and I need to really keep these things in the forefront of my mind.

1. Stop obeying inhuman standards.

Don't keep falling into the very common trap of trying to live up to perfect
standards. Accept that you are human and so are everyone else. Everything and everyone has flaws and things don't always go as planned. You can still improve things but they will never be perfect.

And realize that you won't be rejected if things or you aren't perfect. At least not
by reasonably well-balanced human beings, like most people actually are in
reality.

2. Stop comparing yourself to other people and what they have.

One very common and destructive daily habit is to constantly compare your life
and yourself to other people and their lives. You compare cars, houses, jobs, shoes,
money, relationships, social popularity and so on. And at the end of the day you pummel your self-esteem to the ground and you create a lot of negative feelings within.

3. Stop being a bad friend to yourself.

When you stumble or fall don't treat yourself like a bad friend or a jerk of a boss
would. Instead, ask yourself how your best friend/parent would support and help you in
this situation and do that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I let yesterday get way out of control and I am beating myself up over it. I need to stop trying to be perfect (all or nothing), stop comparing my weight loss journey to others, and give myself the same break I give to my friends. It's just a bump in the road - not a permanent failure.

The source of the majority of my stress is leaving today for almost 3 weeks. My SIL is going to be living with us for a while. I didn't think it was going to be a big deal but the past three days have shown me otherwise. My procrastinating behaviors pale in the face of hers. And she ALWAYS wants to eat at a restaurant or bring home takeout. I cannot let this interfere with me and my plans. I have 3 weeks to get my act together, get myself in a good routine that can't be affected by her, and have my home organized so that whatever she does it will not get in my way.

Wish me luck - I am going to need it!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STEVEN2GO2 3/25/2013 4:20PM

    Good luck ~ I hope the next three weeks for you turn out well.

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CINDYSDAY 3/24/2013 10:03PM

    emoticon

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BUTRFNGRZ 3/24/2013 9:59PM

    Good luck! I know you can do it!!!

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GEORGIA_KAY 3/24/2013 7:22PM

    Loved the positivity advise....I wish you the best of luck!

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NEWME0519 3/24/2013 7:10PM

    Love this! Thank you for sharing!

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MS_PERCEPTION 3/24/2013 6:08PM

    It's absolutely essential to be realistic with yourself. Sure your SIL living with you will be a challenge, but it will also help you learn how to deal with different situations you haven't had to deal with before. Please be gracious with yourself as you adjust to whatever life is handing you right now. I'm confident you will succeed in the long run. emoticon

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MORRIGAN11 3/24/2013 6:04PM

    Great advice! I'm going to subscribe to that blog as it sounds very helpful!

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WOUBBIE 3/24/2013 5:49PM

    That is some GREAT advice. I especially agree with the first one.

I can cheerfully admit that I have a multitude of flaws, and still not think that I'm a total waste of space. I think I look at myself (both my physical self and my mental self) like "home improvement" projects. You never tear the entire house apart all at the same time, you focus on one or two or three problem areas at a time. And even after you've remodeled a room, you continue to tweak it because you find stuff that doesn't function as well as it should.

At work we use the ABLE model to problem-solve:

Assess
Bui
ld
Launch
Evaluate
>Repeat as necessary.

Good luck with your SIL. Did you know that the Chinese pictogram for the word that means "strife" is a picture of two women under one roof? LOL!

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DAWNWATERWOMAN 3/24/2013 3:52PM

    I loved not only the positivity lesson, but your refreshing honesty about your SIL & the issues that are coming up with her living there. You need to take care of DEB. I love you! emoticon

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SUSANELAINE1956 3/24/2013 2:01PM

    I liked your blog. I think that one big difference for me this time around is that I am accepting that I don't have to be perfect to make progress. Setting too high of goals is a prescription for failure, at least for me. I'm making progress. It might take a little longer, but I can live with that.

Good luck with those next 3 weeks. emoticon

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