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Laughter and tears

Saturday, March 23, 2013

This morning is a dreary one with overcast sky and dampness in the air. This kind of day, as well as rainy days tend to make me sad since Ed is gone. They were often boring before the fateful day in October but never sad and he would make me laugh and we would sometimes climb back in bed for a Nap of sorts. There are no more of those times now, just dreary miserable winter days after the first day of spring.
OK, you are asking why I titled this the way I did. Well, I have a lot of friends and acquaintances and one of those, whom we saw the last time at a festival in August, sent me an e-mail this morning. He often sends e-mails but this morning when I opened the one from him I laughed out loud from the first sentence. Then there were sayings that Ed used sometimes and they usually brought laughter from me. Today, along with the laughter the tears started. They have been pouring down my cheeks and onto my t-shirt so much that I will have to change my shirt. The e-mail was hysterically funny and extremely sad , at least for me, at the same time.
Funny, rather odd, how grief affects one.

Lord, again the tears are flowing from me. You know my extreme sadness and you give me laughter at the same time. It is confusing to many, of that I am sure but you understand. Thank you God for emotions, they are part of the human condition and a reminder that because of Your love we humans can love and because we love we are saddened at the loss of the loved ones when they are taken away from our lives.

I am well funded and amply provided for and I thank you for that too Lord.
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