Saturday, March 23, 2013
It has been a quiet yet busy, passive yet active, hectic yet peaceful break for me. My house is still in turmoil from my cleaning escapades. I hope I get finished by the time Monday morning rolls around. However, I have made a couple of important decisions based on this break.
I am not going to work this summer. I don't need to and that is definitely that. I need to be a mom and wife, and my home needs me as well. I can work on my house and take care of my family and be productive. I can also work in my house and not nibble mindlessly. I think I have never trusted myself to be less than working "on the clock" and not just eating whatever was around. I have learned that I don't do that anymore. It's official and for real. I don't do mindless eating anymore. I am so glad to know this and I feel comfortable saying so. This is more personal growth than I expected to become aware of during this break.
I also have learned that I don't have to finish things when I start them. This is also big news for me. I have never been comfortable leaving anything half completed---and that goes as far as to big tasks like moving. I would work hour after hour until the task was done--every stick of furniture in place, dusted, and sitting exactly where I want it perfectly. I don't totally know why I became this type of an adult--I don't ask this of anyone else. However, I have expected it of me. However, during this break, I have been cleaning out cabinets, closets and cupboards all over the house and unfortunately nothing is quite finished. I have gotten okay with my limitations and if I cannot bend over and clean the lower cupboards anymore, I have moved on to something at my shoulder level that doesn't require all of the bending that aggravates my anatomy.
I have learned how to put my needs first as I go through my life. These needs include caring for my family and caring for my home as well as exercising daily and eating carefully. I am doing okay--and yes, this old dog has learned new tricks that are in my best interest.
It has been an awesome spring break. I return to school with nine weeks to help my students to reach their reading goals and I will give that my heart and soul as well. I will, however, give this break business another chance when June rolls around.