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I am definitely my biggest critic...

Saturday, March 23, 2013

I don't really ever give myself praise. I have always had bad self esteem. It didn't help that I was heavy most of my life (pretty much since I hit puberty) and my mom never let me forget it. She would tell me I am fat and ugly and all that stuff. The things mom's are supposed to tell you aren't true. It has always kind of stuck with me. I don't really ever feel beautiful or anything. It is hard for me to take a complement. Most of the ones I get are oh you have such beautiful eyes and stuff like that. Never anything else. I have recently been getting compliments on losing weight and I just don't see it like they do I guess. I mean my clothes definitely don't fit like they did. I have to have a belt to keep my pants up. But I can still wear the clothes its not like they are so big if I keep wearing them I am going to look stupid. Maybe it will be different when I have to buy new clothes because my clothes are that big but right now I am just bummed.

I have fallen off the wagon a little and I am fighting with my scale and I am doing my best to get a workout in but I have been so tired and unmotivated lately that its hard. I just dunno what to do. I am afraid that I am going to fall back into my old ways like I did last time I was on spark people and it is right around the same amount of time that went by as last time. So I am scared and I am just feeling crummy and moody and I am not happy with myself. Need to find something to make me happy. Hopefully getting back on track tomorrow but my support systems aren't working real well right now. Hopefully they get back on track soon too.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Time to start working on being nicer to yourself. Would you be as tough on a friend as you are on yourself? I know it's hard but have more patience and give yourself a hug every now and then. Make a list of all your good qualities (I'm sure they are many) and learn to appreciate yourself. emoticon
    1797 days ago
    You are not a teenager anymore. Your momma's voice is in your head, but it doesn't have to be. Recognize your beauty--internal and external. It's as though you are afraid if you start to feel good about yourself, your mom or someone else will criticize you. And, if they do, so what? Again, you aren't a kid anymore. You can handle this. Whatever they say, doesn't make it true.'s REALLY important that you understand this...whatever negative thoughts you may have about yourself do NOT make them true. Training your mind is truly like training your body. You have to practice thinking positive thoughts about yourself EVERY DAY (and every hour, if possible) just like you have to exercise almost every day. If you don't believe me, believe science. There are tons of articles about it on Sparkpeople and on other sites. Check them out.

    I wish you the best!
    1798 days ago
  • DIANE7786
    Your posted, "Need to find something to make me happy." Someone recently posted this article on their blog, 22 Things Happy People Do Differently. I like it because some of the ideas helped me think of things in my life differently.

    1798 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/23/2013 1:19:04 AM
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