Wow what a week I'm having.
My oldest has been feeling lonely. I understand completely. Now, I'm hoping not to offend anyone (though I probably will) and apologize in advance but California SUCKS at making any friends. You just can't. People are afraid for the most part (with good reason) and if they aren't afraid, they think they belong in Hollywood and are too "good" to associate with the peasants. See, in Washington you could go to the grocery store and it's like Mayberry. You say "Is this Frozen TV dinner any good?" to a random stranger and not only will you get an answer but chances are good that by the end of the 20 minute conversation you or they have been invited to a bbq at such n such's house and see ya next week.
Here, you could go for four years and not say a kind word to anyone. I know, I have yet to receive one. If it weren't for my family and Spark, I don't think I would have really uttered two words since moving here. Really.
So, when my daughter moved to San Francisco she was really really hoping that it would be like Seattle.
No such luck. After her second breakdown at work we decided to spend the Saturday over there to visit her. I think it made a good impact. We walked all around the city and hubby was a trooper, even though he was reeling in pain. We went to the Diner's Drive in and Dive's recommended Pier 23 and I had the fish taco's that was raved about. (the place was really good but not worth the $120 we paid for three people though...so kind of pricey for a "diner, drive in or dive" Then again, it IS Frisco)
As we walked all over the city we discussed how loneliness WAS a global problem and how unfortunately she inherited her social awkwardness from me. We discussed her job and suggested maybe getting one away from children for now (like a restaurant or bar) to interact with adults and not kids all day. Her first priority I said is being a student, so she didn't have to be a teacher just yet. (She's working 7-9 hours a day getting paid for 4, it's too much!) Her place doesn't allow pets so she can't have her dog and it's in one of the scariest parts of the city so even the landlord tells her not to be out and night. I told her maybe it was time to look at the singles activity site to just get out and do things with single people (not a dating site, just activities) Really, all she wants is someone to come play Scrabble with her occasionally. Not come over for a girls night and leave early stealing all her alcohol (she tried to make friends... and that's what her co workers did) We also talked about possibly transferring to a familiar place (Washington or closer to us) but to think about it over Spring Break after emotions were a little calmer....
Then in a minute the day was over. We hugged her and told her to think about it over spring break.
Then yesterday I get a text: "Mom, I know you get notified when someone dials 911 on the phone...I'm okay"
I'm like, what? what happened?!
She was on a bus when a very either drugged or unwell person approached and hit on her, asking for her number. She politely said "no, I have a boyfriend" when he started mumbling at her breast "I just want to marry someone! Why won't anyone marry me? I'm going to the hospital now because I need help cuz no one will marry me" on and on all the while never looking her in the face when all of a sudden she says he looked right at her and says "call 911". She asked "um, why?" and he very calmly says to her AT her "because I'm about to kill someone on this bus, would you call 911 for me?" to which she jumped up and started ringing the bell begging to get off the bus.
She gets off and calls the police and waits for the next bus. Only when the police come they evacuate the first bus on to the second bus and guess who is helping everyone off the first bus and escorting them on to the second bus? YES....the GUY!!
Now Panda is very panicked and again ringing the bell. She called the police AGAIN to let them know "helllooooo, you evacuated the crazy dude too!"
We don't know what happened from there, she took the train.
I guess the thing to take out of that though is clearly this guy was also lonely. So lonely he drove himself nuts.
Loneliness really is a global problem.
And raising and worrying about your kids never ends.
I'm going for a run now. I must have texted her a thousand times just to make sure she came home from class okay last night. I think I just need to relax myself.
on a good note: my youngest got to go to Disneyland with her band. She's so excited. And Ms. Kate is now teaching piano lessons. A step towards her ultimate goal of Music Therapy...
Holy cow batman. I'll try not to emotionally eat....I'm going for a run....
Happy Spring!! go say something nice to someone ...anybody. It might be just what they need.