Wednesday, March 20, 2013
I went back to grief support on Sunday night and, although I had not cried during the day, when introducing myself (as we always do as there are usually new people) The tears started to pour out of my eyes. I couldn't stop them; so, said very little then.. We watched the video, all of them I have found to be condescending and patronizing, and we broke up into two groups. All I can say about the evening is that 3 of us in the group are truly grieving, one is using the group for social purposes and attention, one is truly mentally ill and not comprehending what is going on and I wonder if her LCSW knows that she is attending and what they think will be accomplished. Anyway, at the end each of us was to say what we had planned for the week. I said nothing other than going to the bank Thursday. Little did I know what the week would bring?
Isn't that the way though? We often have no idea even what a day will bring much less a week. I think that is where the saying "Best laid plans of mice and men go awry" comes from. Plan to do nothing and that blows up in my face, plan to do something and that usually comes about but sometimes something else also comes up and the days are jammed up.
This week my younger daughter and her family are with me. It is a situation of safety. An exboyfriend of hers is out of jail as of Monday. The judge gave him time served and 3yrs porbation on an absuction charge (yes it was my daughter he abducted). The threat to kill a pllice officer was dropped. A condition of the probation was that he not try to nor have anyone else try to contact her or her family. For 10 hours he called her on the hour. She couldn't turn off her phone as that is also her alarm clock. As a result she and the kids are here with me where she can turn off the phone and where there is a security system.
Now, you ask, why does that make for a busy week? Well, there is picking up the kids so that their mother can go get a restrainng order and see the prosecutor, there are extra dinners to make and lunches to pack or homework to do while Mom helps with homework. My grandboy is Asperger's; so, that is a challenge in itself but he is usually much more cooperative for me. Then there is getting ready for bed, story to read, prayers to say, and songs to sing. Yes, Mom could do it but my grandboy and grandgirl particularly ask for me to do these things with them. How could I refuse the honor?
Tomorrow is banking to take care of, laundry to do after I change my bed, and whatever else comes up. Friday? I am not sure. Saturday? A birthday party for a 6yr old son of a young friend; so, I guess that tomorrow or Friday I will be buying a present and looking for the perfect card!
So, when I go back to grief support on Sunday I will have much to report concerning my week that had no plans. I will also be able to report that I have had two more days with no tears. What an accomplishment.
Oh, I did work in a 30 minute walk today!