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    BUTTERFLYANGEL7   9,464
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Not feeling good

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

The last couple of weeks have been tough...my dad has been a jerk lately and continuously telling me how horrible I am...nothing i do is right...when something goes wrong it is always my fault, and nothing I say can change that...nothing I say matters...I am just really frustrated right now...I feel so stupid and worthless....and to top it off a couple of my friends are having problems, people have been really rough on one of them and I have had to play clean up...she has been really hurt and it is bringing her down...so I have been trying to help her through it...and with my dad treating me the way he is, I am really drained emotionally and physically...I have been working out alot lately and reading...trying to take care of myself...but I am just having a really hard time pulling myself through it, because it just doesnt end with my dad and my friends who need my support...I just dont know what to do anymore....I hate myself and I really hate stupid people, who get their kicks out of hurting others.

Monika
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TRACY180 3/21/2013 1:09PM

    Sorry that you are having such a tough time. I am glad that you get to see your therapist today. Good job on all the work that you do to help others. (I hope they don't take advantage of all that you do for others.)
As for your dad, I think I remember that he is the one who is responsible for paying your bills for you. That makes it hard to avoid negative comments from him. You can limit your exposure to him and his comments some and constantly remind yourself that what he says isn't true. Keep using your self-talk skills. I hope you feel better soon.

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SASIKHASI1 3/21/2013 2:24AM

    I was in the same situation with my family as you are with your dad. I finally removed myself from their line of fire. I do not go to family gatherings, they are not my friendds on Facebook, I do not call them, nothing. I have not talked to my three sisters and one of my brothers for over four years. I have as little contact as possible with my mother. My father was horribly abusive, but he has dementia so bad he has mellowed a lot. Since I walked away from their crap, my life has been fullfilling and peaceful. I miss my family but I love my inner peace and newfound self confidence much more. Walk away from it with your head held high. You do not need them.

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WORKOUTWITHPAM 3/21/2013 1:01AM

    emoticon

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ANYVAR54 3/20/2013 10:03PM

    emoticon emoticon that you are having a hard time.
You can only be responsible for yourself and not for anyone elses actions.
Treat yourself well. You do not need to hate yourself. Do what you can to love yourself.

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BUTTERFLYANGEL7 3/20/2013 8:50PM

  I see my therapist tomorrow and I plan to talk to her about it

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AWESOMECHELZ 3/20/2013 7:49PM

    Monika, a long time ago I started treating my parents as ADULTS and not just my parents. I got tired of the abuse and rotten words and then I said to myself, "Would I let another adult talk to me that way?" NO, of course not! So once I decided they were adults (which they are), I stopped them from abusing me. You have rights as an adult lady and don't have to take the abuse anymore. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon Love, Chelsea

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TKLBRIDGET 3/20/2013 7:43PM

    try to stay away from the "friends" who get their kicks out of hurting others. Have you told your dad how you feel? How about going to a therapist and talking it out? As you are supporting your friends, let them help you too. I send you warm thoughts and hope you are feeling better soon.
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