Wednesday, March 20, 2013
I am too complacent. I feel good. I like the way I look. Clothes are easy to buy. I get lots of compliments. My last A1C test dropped significantly. I take hard classes in the gym and I can not only keep up but kill it. Do I see room for improvement? Yes, lots of it. I am still very overweight. My BMI still puts me in the the obese category. I wear a size 12, which I can't remember when the last time in my life I wore that, but I dream of a size 8. I eat very healthily, lots of fruit and vegetables, whole grains, lowfat dairy. I don't overeat by a lot, but just enough every day to keep my weight stable rather than losing.
I have run in several races and have 2 more coming up in a couple of weeks, but I don't feel the competitive spirit at all. I am always just competing with myself. My own time from a previous race. Do I feel good during and after a race? I do, however, get angry if I am passed by another racer that I think I should be beating. My friends are all faster than me and when I see them go by me, I don't think that I should try and keep up. I very calmly think "wow, look at them go."
I don't know how to knock myself out of this mindset. I have been on SP for a couple of years now and maybe it is just a little bit too old hat. Maybe I am just going through the motions. I am not thinking of leaving, but something needs to light a fire under me. Any suggestions?