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Sometimes I wish you could just pick your family instead of accepting the one given to you.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Sometimes I wish you could just pick your family instead of accepting the one given to you.

When my grandmother died my Aunt went through all of her things and took whatever she wanted to her kids and then left everything else for my brother and I to sift through.I was amazed at the things she was willing to toss (like my mother's and uncle's baby bracelets from the hospital). When we began to box up items we wanted to keep she got rather angry with us that we were "taking too much". Apparently she needed us to leave enough behind for her friends to go through as well. Um. Excuse me? Did they even KNOW my Grandmother?

Now we are planning my cousins bridal shower and I come to find out that she is at it again. She is using her mother's and my grandmother's tea sets as centerpieces and party favors!! She said no one would have wanted them anyway and they would never have gotten used. She never asked me. I would not only have loved to have them I would have used them often. So, I politely ask her if I could take one of each pattern and replace them with vintage tea cups I purchase so she will still have an equal number.

Her reply?

Do you mean to tell me that you don't have anything of Gramie's????????????
I do remember a certain Thanksgiving with a room filled with things of Grandma's plus furniture, etc. Surely you have things...............

I took a deep breath and replied with:

I offered to purchase tea cups to replace the ones I am taking. Is it so wrong to want to have keepsakes from those I love?

Just needed to vent. I can see this is going to be another uphill battle...
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • OPTIMIST1948
    Sometimes people are just thoughtless. ((hugs))
    1673 days ago
  • TERRI289
    I am so sorry....it would be better to be able to pick family..Take a deep breath and hang in there...You were handling it well but as for your aunt...ick... emoticon
    1674 days ago
    So Sorry for the trouble you are having.
    Too bad we cant trade in bad relatives.LOL
    Take care and "karma' will take care of the rest.
    1674 days ago
  • HHB4181
    So sorry to hear this..... sounds awful. Some people are just... not nice.
    1674 days ago
    I just hope you win that battle.
    1674 days ago
    Oh my goodness, I actually gasped out loud when I read this! Holy cow! I agree with PHEBESS - anyone who can sneak over there and shake some sense into her?! (or at least covertly "borrow" the teacups?!)

    I know how much you love tea too!

    I believe we all have to make our own family growing up. Just because you are blood related does not mean you are really family. Tough lesson, and I'm still learning it.

    Good luck though, your aunt sounds like a piece of work.
    1674 days ago
    when my grandma got sick she started giving out a lot of keepsakes before she died. One of my aunts was really ticked after the funeral because some stuff was "missing". the fact is the will mentioned them but said they were already given to the right person. of course my aunt called to see what everyone had. she still does not know that i have great great grandma B's silver. she wont find out either. none of us are amitting to having any thing and we hide it when she comes over.
    1675 days ago
    Wow - your aunt is pretty nuts!

    Is there a cousin who might be on your side, who could help you out?
    1675 days ago
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