Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Well it certainly is hump day, and in my timezone I'm about half way through the hump. I can't wait for the weekend - I'm going to sleep in (who am I kidding? I will probably be up at the crack of dawn - that's just how it goes!)
This week I've been thinking a lot about life and all that comes with it. I've been reflecting on where I've been and what my plans are and for the most part, things are going well.
As mentioned in my last blog, I'm really struggling with my job lately and I'm certain that the work I do and the lack of appreciation I receive is not worth the peanuts I'm being paid in. I'm a little lost about what I should be doing in that respect. I'm about to turn 30 and I have no career. Just a job. That worries me a lot - I was never able to afford schooling so I simply didn't go. I'm kind of at a crossroads. I decided I will keep my job here for the time being, and I'm going to start seeking out jobs I want. It may take a while for me to find the right one, but I am a very hard worker with a great personality so I'm bound to find something, right?
I am striving to make 2013 my best year yet, and I know I can do it. The last time I had that feeling I lost 60lbs in 5 months, ditched 200lbs of additional weight (in the form of an ex boyfriend), planned a trip overseas on my own (something I would never expect I'd actually do) and found a man who is perfect for me in every way. That was a wonderful year! I want to do that again, so I will.
Every month we have a little more money saved up for a down payment on a home. I never thought I'd actually be a home owner so the fact that this is almost within my grasp feels amazing. It will take some time yet still, but I'm really happy to realize just how much I've had to sacrifice to get into this position and to know that I'm doing it! That's when all my dreaming will start coming true. I have big plans to have an amazing garden, full of vegetables, herbs, flowers, everything! My plan is to slowly work to achieve sustainability. I really admire people who grow their own food, whether it's a rooftop garden in a busy urban high rise or a little family farm where you only have to go to the grocery store for a few odds and ends. I will get there. It will take a lot of time, but anything worth having seems to take time. I will probably talk a lot more about that aspect of my dreams in future blogs. I daydream about these things most of the day and it has really added a spark to my life. I am the kind of person who needs to look forward to things or else I get down in the dumps, and even though this is ridiculously long term (not to mention, no one believes I will actually make these dreams reality) it's great because I have all these days/months/years to look forward to something grand!
Do you have goals that seem ridiculously unattainable? Do you keep them a secret so people don't judge you or in fear of not being supported? Who cares what others think! If you want it, go get it!