I feel like I am officially back in the game, no more sidelines for me.. This past two weeks has been really rough on trying to follow my lifestyle change seeing as I have been moving which meant a lot of eating quick fast and convenient things… fast food.. lucky for me according to my fitbit moving tons of boxes up two flights of stairs, cleaning and packing burned a lot more calories than normal the good part is this was a good lesson in keeping the spark and looking at what has changed even when you aren’t able/willing to be as committed through some tough situations in life. The whole two week transition I kept the spark by still keeping my healthy routine during the work day (the evening was harder for me) and constantly thinking how much I wanted to get completely back on track also by trying to keep up with at least logging on to spark every day.
The huge change in me was before I would have allowed others to carry more things for me instead of lifting and taking stuff up stairs myself this time I was a machine constantly running up and down those stairs and happy to knowing I was still getting some good cardio in lol also before this change I would have gone all out, eating wise even though I was hitting up fast food I was trying to remain in my calorie range and choosing better options than normal also eating much less than I would have before, this change has really helped me to learn to listen and know my body better, instead of using food as an excuse I used it as fuel. Completely different out look towards food. For example I use to hate when my mom would suggest we share a meal when eating out together, for some mental reason I would feel like I wasn’t going to get enough food or something so I would tell her I was really hungry and order my own. Now a couple of days ago we went out to a burger place and I asked if we could share and she agreed so we both had a half of a burger and when it came I instantly started to think how small a portion that was but after eating it I was satisfied, not stuffed or full like normal and it was a great feeling to just be able to enjoy things in small amounts, be satisfied and move on.

I was a bummer that I feel I lost two weeks of progress but on the positive side it has given me more motivation to work even harder this week, also I didn’t gain any weight so I can’t look at these weeks as complete waste.

I am starting to feel like there is a whole new me now, I have moved, going back to school to finish up my degree and pursue a career I actually enjoy, losing weight and changing my sketchy relationship with food. Actually feeling happy soul deep.. It hasn’t been easy but with a few tough decisions and some hard work everything is coming into place.