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why am i doing this?

Sunday, March 10, 2013

i am doing spark coach, and today's action plan was to figure out WHY i want to lose weight... emoticon

come on, i ALREADY know why i want to lose weight, DUH. i want to lose weight, because i want to... ah, wait a minute, emoticon , i mean, i know i want to look good, feel better about myself, have fun buying clothes, ect... but those are PRODUCTS of what happens as a result of me losing weight... emoticon

but what is the real reason i want to get more in shape, be fit??? emoticon

i have been "visualizing" being fit, but i only see myself that way for a second, then it is gone. i have to really know WHY i am doing this, so that i can visualize myself for more than just a second.

about 4 years ago, i won the biggest loser at my work, i had lost all the weight i wanted to, was more in shape than i had EVER been in, i felt great, buying clothes that fit me, ect... BUT i was also DOING what i always wanted to do...

i was TEACHING fittness, and karate to others! i had classes that i was leading, i loved helping others. NOW THAT is what i really want to "do" when i reach my goals. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon ...

i want to be the "fit" friend... my friends thought of me as the instructor that kicked their butts into shape, making them sweat, work hard to achieve their goals and dreams!

these past few days, i have more than "fallen of the wagon"... i fell off, rolled down a hill, and landed in a patch of quicksand. i had some really stressful days. but looking back, i couldn't "SEE" the reason WHY i was doing this.

today, is an "i get it" moment! know i gotta find pics that will help me remember everyday, why i am doing this. please don't get me wrong, i am not THAT shallow, i want do get in shape to be a better and active mom, better wife, live longer ect., but i think i needed to remember the one thing i want "for me". i have often heard that if you want to lose weight, quit smoking, drinking, gambling, ect.. you can't do it for others, you have to do it for yourself... which is hard for me, i always want to do things for my husband, my kids, friends. i do things to help them, if i do something for myself, i feel guilty, selfish. not that i am gonna stop doing them, but i need to remember (and not only give "lip service to") that i am worthy, and important, God has a plan for me, too. He (God) as given me passions, and talents and gifts, i need to use them.

funny thing is, even though 4 years ago, when i did this, i still felt over weight! i don't have ANY pics of myself. i weighed 147 lbs, (which is my goal) never had been in better shape, but not one pic of me, feeling good about myself. so, i need to find pics of others and insert me in their place.

okay, today's action plan is a good one, time to get to it...

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LOVE2MY3
    Great blog! I, too, have trouble doing things for myself. When you are a wife and mother, you do things for them, not you! We get so caught up in taking care of everyone else, that we forget about ourselves. So I have decided that I am going take better care of myself so I can become healthier and happier! And having this outlook has really made me dedicated to my goals. We deserve this!!
    1834 days ago
    OMG....thats so weird....I got down to 135 2 years ago...now I'm up to 160ish (again)....I was looking for picture the other day to help motivate me...NOT ONE...what the heck....I lost all that weight...felt like a freak'n Rock star and not one picture....REALLY???? Such a great blog...I'm glad I'm not the only one that had this happen...(mental note....take more pictures this time!!!!) emoticon
    1835 days ago
    Great epiphany! I'm glad you're seeing things more clearly!
    1835 days ago
  • TERRY0217
    Love the "it moment" like they tell us on the planes, if that air mask comes down...put your on before you help someone else....we have to take care of ourselves first in order to take better care of others... emoticon
    1835 days ago
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    1836 days ago
  • TERESA6262
    Great blog! Thanks for sharing!
    1836 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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