Sunday, March 10, 2013
I woke up this morning with another nightmare/terror. I've had them off and on for years...usually one every few months or so. I'm not sure where they come from but I wake up in such panic that I can't breathe. These things scare the hell out of me and also my husband. Unfortunately, he gets angry because I can't even remember what it was about. Then he gets angry because I can't stay in bed. I feel the overwhelming urge to run away. I don't really run away; but, I end up pacing the house for hours trying to calm down. I know my husband's anger comes from not being able to help me; but, getting angry at me doesn't help me calm down much.
I think today may be a good day to have a talk with my baby sister who has experienced night terrors her whole life. Maybe she can shed some light on how to deal with them. I think they are back again because I started therapy last week. Guess opening up the can of worms that is my brain is going to be harder than I thought.
Anyway, I've been getting in 10 minutes of walking for the past couple of days. Today, I plan on getting on the treadmill and not stopping until I hit that three mile mark. Time to resume making my workouts a priority and try to use them to help get me out of this depression and relieve some anxiety. I actually managed to eat something yesterday so that is definitely a plus. Unfortunately, looking back over the past 8 days, I've only had two meals (one last Saturday and one Wednesday night). I can't count yesterday as a meal; but, I did eat some trailmix and had some cheese and crackers w/ apple slices. I'm trying.....
I hope you all have a great day. Spark on SparkFriends!