Saturday, March 09, 2013
I was down in the dumps for a while,but now I am feeling better. I am just tired of pushing! But I know it is for the better of my life. Usually when I feel this way,I would just give up and do what I want for months on end,and tell my self who cares,eat how you want and be happy,but After a few months I was not happy at all!! So like I have said in most my blogs I am done with that! I was so happy 2 wks ago to see the numbers on the scale going down. Then to see I was out of the 170s it was awesome,then I ran out of groceries and it went down hill( I dont drive,never did,dont even know how) I have to wait around for when my hubby wants to go shopping,then I'm stuck eating crappy foods!! So I got on the scale this week,and I weighed in at 171,and it depressed me! All that work and feeling so happy just to be short lived!! But I have to realize that is a number that measures my weight,and not my worth!!! Sure I want the numbers to go down,but I'm not going to let the number define who I am!!!
I really need to start logging my foods,but man I just hate doing it! it is so tedious for me. And I have to get on the computer every time i eat something. Or i total all my foods,then I'm laying in bed for the night and realize I forgot something. Or this is the biggest for me,I hate seeing when I go over in calories!!!! Plus when I was on my fitness pal,I would log in my foods,and everyone would send me messages lecturing me about not eating tofu and almonds all day!! then i was embarrassed to post my foods and felt just stupid about it,but that was then,and this is now. I need to get over it and move on. Plus this is not my fitness pal!! I like spark people much better
Basically I know what I have to do...I just need to do it!!! If I do every thing I can,then i will feel good knowing that I am giving my all!! And I am doing ok now,but not my all. It is time to step it up!!