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BFFs...But Not Really Forever.

Thursday, March 07, 2013

Today I had to work with my former best-friend-forever. He was my buddy. I have never been so close to anyone in my whole life. I trusted him completely.

Then our friendship got complicated. (I think you know what I mean.) So, we stopped being friends. I felt betrayed, because the way I saw it, HE made it complicated. I just wanted to remain BFFs.

So today, I had to deal with him. He was all puppy dog eyes. He told me how good I look. He told me he liked my sweater. The whole time he just stared at me with the puppy eyes.

If I could have crawled into a hole, I would have. I feel awful, because he was my best friend! BUT we can't ever be friends again.

Now, I can't eat. I had my meals planned out, but I can't eat a bite. There's no way I'm going to get enough calories today. I feel TERRIBLE. I feel like I just want to hide forever.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Girlie, I feel you! I've been in those shoes, and it's not easy. Just remind yourself that sometimes, relationships have to change or end. It's not always a happy process, but it is what it is. The key thing here is what YOU are going to get from this. Every situation offers a learning opportunity- You just need to decide what the lesson was.

    I hope it gets easier for you!

    1781 days ago
    Thanks TERMITEMOM. I am trying to do just that. It's difficult, because we both work at the same college. It's a big place. So, most of the time, we can avoid each other, but every once in a while, he pops up.

    I need to be more assertive and not allow him to manipulate me anymore. Not even a little bit!
    1782 days ago
    I agree with DS9KIE - just ignore the jerk. Take a deep breath and move on!
    1782 days ago
    Ha! I was joking about the blindfold. I'll be fine the next time I have to deal with him. He'll be pathetic. That's his game. I'll let him play it. He needs to start facing reality.
    1782 days ago
    Nooo!!!! face your fear ,look him in the eye. He has no power over you. He has it as long as you allow it. Think about what you wrote about him.
    1782 days ago
    Yep, you are stronger than that. I am sure it is akward at best, but you will get through this. It will kill him to see how great you are doing without him. emoticon
    Missourians Team
    1782 days ago
    He's a manipulative jerk. I shouldn't let him rattle me like that, but I did.

    He knows just how to upset me. His goal when he showed up was to make me feel guilty for my rejection of him, and I was dumb enough to let it work.

    I almost called in sick today, so I wouldn't have to deal with him at all, but then I told myself I was being ridiculous. I shouldn't let him run me off of my territory like that. I thought I'd be strong enough to deflect the puppy dog eyes routine, but I failed.

    Next time I have to deal with him, I'm going to wear a blindfold.

    1782 days ago
    I had to go through a similar situation and it SUCKED. It's strange when someone who was SUCH an important part of your life is now this awkward stranger. It sounds like you have your head on straight - it does (and will) suck but at least you know it can't go back to the way it was (that's a huge realization!). Continue moving forward!
    1783 days ago
  • DS9KIE'll live...just think of him as a tree that you pass thinking nice tree and then walk (ok this just tongue and cheek and its hard to convey when typing)
    1783 days ago
    Hmmm, well from purely macho male prospective. You have transcended your old former BFF friendship. I know you wish things were different but they are not. Don't let someone have this kind of power over you. There are clearly some residual feeling there that have not been resolved.I am willing to bet he seemed perfectly comfortable in the situation. You must gain this strength since you will probably be in this situation again.
    Remember your blog about not letting other push you around,Are you saying everyone, But Him?
    You should be angry that he complicated things and left you in turmoil.Don't throw a brick at him,but he does not matter anymore. Take your power back.Or fold up like a tent in a hurricane when he is present and leave you feeling like you do now.
    One of the things I like about you is you don't care about the opinions of others . I remember reading a blog where another sparkie said she was going to not comment on anymore of your blogs because of something you said. You said maybe she should and stayed true to yourself.You can do the same here.
    Soooo..........Are you the firmly rooted oak in the hurricane or the tent?
    You are probably going to get the usual over emotional female comments because women have feelings and men don't ,but I am sure your BFF is not having the same difficulty as you are having.Apologies and I hope things get better for you.( apologies to the female commenters who will be commenting after. I meant no harm to the female gender,stating an opinion)
    1783 days ago
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