Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.

    ISAVEDME80   18,820
15,000-19,999 SparkPoints


Thursday, March 07, 2013

****EDIT***I realize I wrote this post out of hurt and a bit of anger. I try not to complain ...
I try not to be that kind of a person.
But I'm human and I didn't feel comfortable leaving it up how open I was about my ANT so i removed that section and put in my planner. She does not deserve my emotions there...So this jumbled leftovers is here. . sorry for complaining.
Definition=My moms sister AKA
Small minded person who thinks the world revolves around her AKA
Emotional Cannibal who preys on others and eats them with words to lift up themselves AKA
Tiny insect with big head that invades personal space to sabotage
My reaction NOW is wanting to eat cause im hurt by something she did to my grandma :(
. so I'm going to have me a nice salad its what I crave most the times because I think I must be a bunny rabbit deep down??

I love salads. I love it that my body craves a salad now instead of junk that my inner fat girl would want
What I am going to do now is pray for my ANT who PREYS on others cause she has a guilty hunger...

Pray that she opens her eyes and changes before she looses her Mom.
I do not wish the pain upon anyone of losing a parent. When I lost my Mom I lost myself for a long time. But now that I'm finding me again. I'm only wanting the best for my ANT because rather or not she deserves to know my grandma, My grandma deserves to be loved....

Please God open my ANTS eyes for my grandmas sake. it hurts me so much that she is hurting my grandma. I don't care about the hurtful things she does to anyone else but I love my grandma and I see her suffer over the actions of her daughter the ANT


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
DRAGONFLY126 3/8/2013 12:51PM

    Good for you eating that salad. Very proud of you. as for you ant good move on your part. Not knowing you and your ant and the family dynamics, all I can say is we can never really know what their relationship was like. But when the time comes she may regret her actions. Just continue to love your Grandma with all your heart. Big Hugs!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
COCK-ROBIN 3/7/2013 11:37PM

    Very good!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PLATINUM755 3/7/2013 11:24PM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLAHALLA 3/7/2013 11:21PM

    i do believe there is one in every family

Report Inappropriate Comment
KALLIE1958AR 3/7/2013 9:18PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
ANYVAR54 3/7/2013 8:53PM

    You show grace by asking God to show her what she is doing, and asking him to change her. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRYMARY42 3/7/2013 5:56PM

    just be strong and hope that your ant will soon see what she is doing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CLPURNELL 3/7/2013 5:38PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
NEWKATHYNOW 3/7/2013 4:11PM

    It had to be hard to put that all down to be seen and read anad you should be very, very proud of yourself. Unloading all the past is a step in the healing of old hurts. I share your pain at the loss of your Mom. My Mom has been gone since 2001 and I still miss her every single day. Please know that you have lots of support here on SP.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SATCHMO99 3/7/2013 4:01PM

    Sometimes it helps to write a letter to the hurtful person. No need to mail it. Some people burn their letter, or rip it into the tiniest pieces.

You are a lovely person, and you had a lovely mum. You don't need to have any more contact with ANT. When the time comes for your grandmas funeral (sorry, but it will at some time), please have enough cash for a cab fare and when ANT becomes abusive just walk away, call a cab and leave.

Hugs for you x

Report Inappropriate Comment
AWESOMECHELZ 3/7/2013 3:43PM

    Sometimes I write down when things go wrong to get them out of my system too. You trusted us here to listen to you and I thank you. I haven't talked to my family since 1986 when I realized associating with them was not only dangerous but unhealthy. Like you, I don't wish them evil but I don't have to be part of their abuse either. Continue to take care of yourself and love those in your life now. You are on the right road. emoticon Love, Chelsea

Report Inappropriate Comment
BLONDIE218145 3/7/2013 3:39PM

    I hope you feel better, too! Wow, that's alot to handle AND you lost that weight. Do a HIGH FIVE with me when you read this. That abuse is not only unhealthy but illegal ...take care of yourself, PLEASE!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BARBARASDIET 3/7/2013 3:32PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
*RENEAT* 3/7/2013 3:32PM

    I hope getting that out made you feel better. It is a positive way to deal with the emotion. I am proud of you!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

Log in to post a comment.

Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

Other Entries by ISAVEDME80