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Who Are You?

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

The Who, Chicago, 1975

I’m going to use March to get to know my body better so I can understand what it is trying to tell me. All this fat is a message from my body and I need to learn to understand it so I can work toward the healthy me.

Each and every day and night, my heart beats and pumps blood through my body; my lungs, kidneys, liver and stomach work every day without any supervision from me. They keep my body functioning and I finally have realized their true wonder.

In the past, for a variety of reasons, I came to think of my body as my enemy. In spite of the way I treated it, my body continued to take care of me with little complaint. Any complications that came up with my body, in spite of the terrific stresses I asked it to survive under, have been minor. Somehow, I lost sight of how much my body was doing for me on a daily basis and forgot that of all my friends, I could always count on my body.

How did I treat my body like an enemy? I did not have a full length mirror in the bathroom. I never saw myself naked. This was by design. I hated seeing photos of myself. As if the photos were lying and this was not how I was treating my body. I shopped for clothes only on the internet . . . that way I didn’t have to see myself in the dressing room mirrors.

In the shower I had lots of negative self-talk. I filled my mind and my body with this poison on a daily basis.

My body withstood this neglect and abuse, and never let me down. My heart is still pumping, my lungs still breathing, and other parts seem to be working well. It sent me a message with high blood pressure, but I was able to make it “shut-up” by giving it some pills. It tried to tell me how disconnected I was from it via depression, I tried to make it “shut-up” by dosing it with antidepressants. It tried to reach me with various infections and conditions, but I always treated the symptoms and never assessed my relationship with my body.

I did make some changes along the way. I quit smoking. I quit drinking soda. On the other hand, I often tried to make my body “shut-up” by going on a diet or working out to “punish” it for the crime of not being beautiful and to “punish” myself for my excess. Over the years I’ve been to Weight Watchers a number of times, followed a low-fat diet, tried Atkins a couple of times, plain calorie counting, and others. I was never able to stick to anything for more than a year and always gained weight plus back. I finally threw in the towel and just started eating to get into a bliss zone with sugar-salt and fat.

I’ve been doing my healthy eating within a set calorie range and logging my food for a year this March. I am off the sugar-salt-fat night time eating and binge eating merry-go-round. I plan to eat this way for the rest of my life because I feel so good. I feel like my new way of eating has given me my life back. I enjoy working out (I know, what?) and am in love with my yoga classes.

As I listen to my body, some of the messages are tough and I don’t want to hear them. But if my body and I are going to be good friends, I need to hear what it has to say. We won’t get fooled again.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Love this blog. I can relate to the negative self talk and feelings when we do not honor our bodies. Your appreciation of your body reminds me of Og Mandino's, "The Greatest Miracle in the World". My favorite book in his motivational series. Great goals.
    1813 days ago
    You speak for so many of us! I appreciate what you said about treating our bodies like "the enemy" and the "bliss eating of sugar-fat-salt." Being grateful for the miracle of a beating heart and working lungs -- YES!
    1814 days ago
  • JILL313
    Great Blog and I am so happy you and I are treating our bodies so much better. I just wish I wouldn't have waited so long to give my body the love and respect it truly deserves. . .I love how great you feel with your healthy new changes and habits. Keep moving forward dear friend you're certainly taking good care of yourself feeding your precious body healthy food and moving more. When I was really fat I did almost all of the things you did as I really didn't want to see myself as I was, fat and ugly in my eyes. Keep moving forward my friend.

    Hugs & Love,

    1814 days ago
    Getting to know your body is a critical part of creating a successful healthy lifestyle. YOU can do it and you are off to a great start.
    1814 days ago
  • DR8561
    Love-love-love your blog! I needed this today. Very well said!
    1815 days ago
    Thank you for sharing from your heart . This is a great blog. I can definitely relate to your feeling about your body. I too was very mean to my body. And neglected my body for years and years... But like you, I finally started appreciate my body and myself. I too quite smoking, it will be almost 2 years now. So glad that I quite. I have started my health journey when I was way too much obese BMI but thankfully I've lost quite a good amount of weight. And hopefully, By the time this 5 % challenge is over, I looking to be in a normal BMI.. I think self love/respect is the way to go and secret of success on weight loss and healthy living. I wish you the very best. Because you deserved it
    emoticon emoticon
    1815 days ago
  • LYNCHD05
    I love this blog. You have given it a lot of thought and I enjoyed the way you talked about your amazing body. Way to go on the year of eating properly and exercising. It really does make you feel better.
    1816 days ago
    Who Are You? You really wanted to know and you have some deep insights here. Thank you for holding up the mirror for all of us. I find myself remembering me (I even blogged about it) - but I think it is a constant, daily effort to do so. Sounds as if you have some good habits in place already... I know you will succeed! And you won't get fooled again emoticon
    1816 days ago
  • GRANDMA1951
    Good for you. Sounds like you really know what you're doing.
    1816 days ago
    emoticon You are headed in the right direction: going towards great health, a long life and an absolute awareness of yourself! Looking forward to seeing you become mindful of yourself at every chance!
    1816 days ago
    Good plan - keep moving right along. emoticon
    1816 days ago
  • ANYVAR54
    Wonderful thing to work on. Self image, what you think about yourself.
    How are you going to do this? journal, continue to blog, let yourself look at your naked body? Shop for clothes at a store? Put up positive thoughts about yourself around your home so that you see them often? those are just a few ideas I have for you. Love your topic. and your blog.
    1816 days ago
    Absolutely fabulous blog! You have come a long way, baby, and you have bought yourself a ticket to a long, healthy, happy life. emoticon
    emoticon Carol emoticon
    1816 days ago
    LISE emoticon
    1816 days ago
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