Tuesday, March 05, 2013
Alright. I have to get something off my chest here. I am a nervous wreck. Even to the point that I woke up in the middle of the night trying to catch my breath last night. I understand exactly why I'm feeling this way, because my DH decoded my thoughts. I'm going to spend several days with my parents next week, and I will be alone with them--this could be bad folks. Let me explain...
My parents have been known to be very harsh critics of my life, particularly where my weight is concerned (especially my dad). Several, more than I can count, comments have been made about my weight over the years. Now, as all of you know, I have been fighting the good fight against my weight for a long time and was making no progress. Then I wound up pg, and I certainly haven't been weighing on a daily basis. The problem is, because I wasn't completely where I needed to be, and because I gain weight (and always have) in my stomach, I already have a huge looking stomach in this pregnancy. When all those muscles began relaxing that I had worked so hard to tighten up, my belly just started to really hang out there, and add to it the continuing growth, and I am already showing. I can just imagine all of the comments that will ensue. And I won't have my protector/warrior with me this time. My knight and shining armor is sending me away so he can finish up some of the chemical processes in our remodel that I cannot be around while pregnant. This will be the first time I'm spending with my parents alone since before my DH came into my life over 3 years ago. He's always so good at diverting their negativity with alternate conversation without sounding like a jerk. They LOVE my DH...sometimes I think more than me! No....really.
In all honesty, I am not trying to have a pity party here. I'm just so scared they are going to make comments about my increasing weight. I don't think it will matter if I tell them I'm still eating healthy and being careful not to pig out. I can imagine them thinking "yeah...right." I really hope none of this comes true. The last visit we had with them, they really behaved and kept all nasty comments to themselves. It was actually a nice visit! So, I'm hoping this time will be pleasant, but who knows? They aren't exactly overjoyed at my pregnancy either, so I'm not too sure what to expect. I know I'm excited! I can hardly stand the excitement of my baby! I go in next week for an ultrasound!!!
So, think of me as I go on Friday--I'm so hopeful that it will go well. In the mean time, I hope I can relax about it and get some rest.
Hope all of you have a wonderful week!