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    JUDITH1654   287,259
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March 3 - Co-worker

Sunday, March 03, 2013

A co-worker returned to work today after moving away for awhile and asked me for a place to live. I wish I could help her but there is absolutely NO ROOM in my little house. I have no couch for her to sleep on, no TV in the living room for her to use, and there is so much work that needs to be done around here that I wouldn't want anyone else living here. The bathroom doesn't work right, etc.

Even if I had the room, there is NO place for her to put her clothes! No spare closet. And Jordan doesn't want a stranger living here, one who would have a key to the house, etc. She told me her husband won't let her live at his house while he is out of town. That tells me something.

So now, I have to find a way to tell her "no" without leaving her berefit. I know it's not my job to take in everyone and I feel badly that I can't help her but it just isn't possible. Does that make me mean?

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SNUZSUZ 3/4/2013 10:57PM

    No you are not mean! If you don't want anyone to stay with you, you don't need a reason other than that:)

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JANET552 3/4/2013 9:56AM

    You are absolutely not mean. It just doesn't work for you now. Good luck!!

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LOSER05 3/4/2013 9:44AM

    family first

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ALEXTHEHUN 3/4/2013 9:13AM

    Absolutely you are NOT mean.

Your reply to her is, "I wish I could but I just can't."

No, "I'm sorry." There is not need to apologize. There is not need to explain. There is no need to justify or provide details.

If she begs or pleads, repeat, "I wish I could but I just can't."

Say it with a smile and a sincere voice, but do not deviate from it.

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    sometimes if you can lead her in a direction to where she can stay it helps alleviate the guilt. is there a shelter in town or a motel that offers weekly rates. maybe the ex could help her for that time until she gets paid. it is the least he could do if he cant give her a place to crash. there is also the ymca, united way, salvation army or even local churchs can help

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JUSTLYLE 3/4/2013 8:08AM

    You have many reasons why not, not excuses, and I see no reason to say yes. There are other places, motel, day rooms, and or gov. that she could contact. Sorry, but out of the question, NO!


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MSLZZY 3/4/2013 7:30AM

    You are being honest. If you don't have room for
another person in your home, please do not feel
like you have to provide one. Sad as it is, it is not
your responsibility to make it work for her.
Offer her sympathy and leave it at that.

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EVER-HOPEFUL 3/4/2013 1:48AM

    tell her the truth that you have no place and explain also about all the dogs and that they would be unsettled with a stranger in the house even if you have the room which you donīt.maybe see if you can get some address of b&b or hostels that might help.surely she will also know other people to ask with living there before.i am sure she will understand.maybe invite her round to dinner or something so she can see for herself that you really havenīt got the room if it will make you feel better.if she is a true friend it wouldnīt matter to her what you place looks like. emoticon

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2ABBYNORMAL 3/4/2013 1:00AM

    No, that doesn't make you mean at all.
You can't do everything.
Tell her the truth. No room at the inn.

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JULIACOLLINS62 3/3/2013 10:53PM

    No you are not mean.
Stay strong. It sounds like a position the co-worker should have never put you in.
( my opinion)

Comment edited on: 3/3/2013 10:54:09 PM

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