Saturday, March 02, 2013
Over the past few months, I haven't been as concerned about the numbers on the scale as I have been in the past. I've been wanting to lost those last 15 vanity pounds for ... ummmm ... I think I've lost count of how long I've "wished" they were gone. I just became more focused on running and living life fully and not so much on the scale. I've learned to steer clear of it, as I have found it has the potential of dictating my mood and I don't like that power it has over me. But I also can't live in denial either, so I do get onto that thing once every two weeks to make sure all is, at least, where it was the last time I was there.
This week was different though. In fact, the last month and a half has been different for me in that money has been very tight. It's a good tight though in that the situation has a very clear ending, then life won't be as tight as it has been. But during this time, I've learned some incredible lessons about food consumption in my home. Mainly that we have looked at food as more of an entertainment staple, rather than a life-preserving necessity. I've been forced to stay out of the grocery store, but once a week or so. I've been put in a position of becoming very creative with what is already in my cabinets, refrigerator and freezer and learning how to come up with meals that are not only nutritious, but also fairly pleasing to the palate. I've also been forced to look to life for more things to do that don't involve eating or cooking.
Becoming so consciously aware of exactly how much food consumption has been going on in my home has resulted in a number of lessons for me.
#1 - not necessary to spend as much money as I have in the past at the grocery store. Not necessary in the least. Pure self indulgence, even though my choices are normally very healthy ones. It's just not necessary for as much as I was doing. Lesson learned.
#2 - I physically do not need to eat as much and as often as I was eating. Can we say emotional eating on a very subconscious level here? Very much so. Lesson learned.
#3 - if you take away the unnecessary snacks that your body physically does not need to keep itself working at its optimum, you can lose some of those 15 vanity pounds you've been holding onto because of your emotional eating done on a very subconscious level. Holy moly look at that, I have finally broken into the 150 range after holding steady in the 160 range for .... ummmmm ... I don't remember how long I've been there. I began losing weight after my second pregnancy which resulted in me weighing in over 200 lbs. It took many years to drop into the 160's. I had gotten down to the 140's at one point, then a very bad marriage took its toll and the weight shot back up.
I've worked long and hard to not let the scale dictate my moods when it gives me a number that I don't like, but when it gives me a number I do like what am I supposed to do? Not be happy? Sorry, that's not going to happen because I am ecstatic about it right now. So I will have to rethink how to deal with the scale and its stinkin' power over my emotions, because I kind of feel like a hypocrite at the mo ... but not in a bad way. Lesson learned, and more lessons to follow with this one.
#4 - don't ever sign a car loan contract without completely understanding what you are signing. Big Big mistake to have allowed my ex (not my ex at the time) to negotiate a wonderful 6.5 year car loan at $500 per month at 18% interest. I'm not going to rant on about the prize of a person he was for purposely leaving this loan on me to take care of. I am making the final payment next week and am feeling over the moon that it will be over. But oh what a lesson that one was. In the words of Homer Simpson "dohhhhhh"... Lesson learned.