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Saturday, March 02, 2013

My DH's knee is acting up again. He had surgery about 4 years ago and it took like 6 months for him to be fully healed. Now it is bothering him again. He is in a foul mood and walks away from me when I try and help. I told him to rest it and take some Advil for inflammation. I also thought that we should go see the doctor as perhaps it just needs to be drained (he says it is swollen) which wouldn't be a big deal. He just mumbles and walks away when I try and discuss it with him. I know that he is upset as his big trip is coming up where he will be going up to his son's house in Pennsylvania for about 10 weeks to finish his basement project. Then at the end of June we are taking the whole family.....his two son's, DIL, two grandchildren, and two sisters to Disneyworld. DH has rented a huge house with pool and all for everyone to enjoy. So I know he is frustrated that his knee is acting up now! I get it. But I just don't feel that the spouse should have to be treated poorly. I am just trying to help. I am not a nagging person thought so once I have said my piece which I did this morning, that is all I will do. The rest is up to him. I just feel bad for him but bad for me as well since I have to put up with it!!! Reminder to self....."only a little over 4 weeks until he goes north"

Thanks for letting me rant and rage.

Hope all my sparks buddies are doing just great today. A bit cloudy and a little chilly here in Mexico today. Although looking out the door the sun is breaking though so it will most likely get up to 80 today again.

Cheers everyone....make it a great day!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    The good news is...

    If they still do this and if his knee is still bothersome when you vacation at Disney, rent a wheelchair at Disney and use the express lines for all of the rides! The whole family can accompany him.
    1845 days ago
    What I have learned about men is...they are fixers and if they can't fix something they get really frustrated. That is why they are such babies when it comes to their health issues. It is something that they can't control!

    1846 days ago
    Yep, sounds like a man! No offense to any men that may be posting on the blog, but I always say in my next life I'm coming back a man. I will speak from experience with my DH.

    I wish I could come home to a clean house, laundry always done, kitchen cleaned, and dinner made most nights. Oh, and I work full time and tutor two mornings and two evenings a week. (My little rant. I'm done!)

    So, I understand your frustration. You are trying to be supportive and help and you get the grumbles and mumbles. You said your piece so now "do for you."
    Hang in there and know other women are here for you!!!!!
    1847 days ago
  • GINA180847
    Yes, I have one of those too. The other day when he was trying to eat some soup and his shake went bonkers(he has a faulty chromosone)he went ballistic. I love that 'Don't poke the bear'. That about sums it up. Mine is finally agreeing to see another neurologist about the shake. The last neurologist seemed more troubled about life than my husband and we did not get anywhere.
    1847 days ago
    1847 days ago
    Ah those knees... My friend had a double knee
    replacement a year ago and she said she doesn't
    really feel any better. She has RA and still has
    pain. Maybe try some tumeric as that is a
    natural anti-inflammatory. I take it every day,
    first thing in the morning. A teaspoon in a cup of
    hot water and I add a teaspoon of milk. It works.
    I don't need my Celebrex anymore. I can under-
    stand he is frustrated but there is no need to take
    it out on you Sallie. Just try and not take it too
    personally. You will soon be able to have your own
    space again in a few. I feel for you. Sending lots of
    hugs. Have a nice Sunday. emoticon
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    1847 days ago
    I feel for you. My Hubby at this time is getting mad at me as he is in pain. I am trying to be understanding and tell myself he is not really mad at me but his helplessness at this time
    1847 days ago
    Sorry to hear that. I hope hubby gets better and YOU survive this!!!
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    1848 days ago
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    1848 days ago
  • MIRAGE727
    I'm practicing listening better so I'm just gonna be quite for a change!
    1848 days ago
    Ice on for 20 minutes. Don't poke the bear. Men do not handle pain well or any that I have ever known. No excuse to be ugly to those trying to help. Hang it there kiddo!
    1848 days ago
    I am enjoying your nice weather LOL Itis snowing right now :-)
    1848 days ago
  • IRP1114
    Sorry you are getting the bad side of things right now. Being in pain really does put you in a bad mood and sometimes it just stays that way as the day goes on. Hope he feels better soon and hope he apologies to you as well! Maybe for now it will work to your advantage if he just wants to stay in ;-)
    1848 days ago
    Men make lousy patients Sallie and unfortunately we cop it big time when they take out their frustrations.
    Try not to let it get to you, I know, I know- easier said than done.
    Take a solo walk and breathe in some fresh air put on some music on your ipod and just take 15 mins to yourself.

    Sending commiserateing hugs, hope he's soonest mended! emoticon
    1848 days ago
    I saw this on our team huddle at 55+ females- and thought I would come over and say hi to a fellow team member and see what was up with MEN! Well, I too have a husband just like that who doesn't like me to remind him of diet or health issues. It does get so frustrating when they don't want to listen or grumble when you keep after them about it. Not to mention mine is a big procrastinator on everything!!!
    Sounds like you have a nice vacation planned on visiting our Disney World here in FL! Lots of fun!
    Hope your husband's knee issues get better and hopefully goes to the Dr. before it gets worse! If he doesn't-Maybe once he is in PA his son can take over with advising him to go to the Dr., especially if it interfere's in his being able to work on the basement! Hang in there!
    1848 days ago
    Hang in there, Sallie. I'm sorry you aren't appreciated as you ought to be. I've got a husband, too, who sometimes is difficult to connect with and can be very moody about health issues. Take good care of yourself. Hope his knee mends up spontaneously and you both can enjoy all your good plans!! -Marsha
    1848 days ago
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    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
    Ahhh,'ve described a pretty stressful, dispiriting situation; I'm sorry. I wonder if your husband has chondromalacia. Mine does, and years ago, he had to have fluid drained from his knee on several occasions. That was decades ago, fortunately. I do think women are a little more proactive than men when it comes to self-care - yes. You understand his sense of frustration quite well, and I'm sorry he's so irritable about this - yes, it's the upcoming trip to PA and the knee situation combined. But I agree: He shouldn't take this out on you.

    A rant was in order! emoticon ...and I hope he gets the knee drained before his trip, if need be... At any rate, it sounds like he "kneeds" emoticon medical attention for it...
    1848 days ago
    **SIGH** Men surely do have a different attitude towards and ways of dealing with health (and other!) issues. All we can do is suggest, walk away and realize . . . WE can take care of OURSELVES, and DH's have to take care of themselves. Frustrating. Glad you vented. YOu're not alone! emoticon
    1848 days ago
    leave it to a man to try and be tough. I hope he does decide to take care of that, take it easy and have a great weekend.
    1848 days ago
    I find ice to be the best for inflammation- better than all the pills I've taken- splurge on a great made for the knee- gel-type- goes in the freezer type ice pack. FedEx it from the states if you have to! 2-3 x a day for 10 mi will make a huge difference and might get him through the next few months.
    Tell him I said so- have had my knees done 3x (one of them twice).
    You are so right- they should not take it out on us when they're miserable!
    1848 days ago
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    1848 days ago
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