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    SISSIE21   27,894
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25,000-29,999 SparkPoints
 
 
Doing what seems impossible

Saturday, March 02, 2013

"You must do the things you think you cannot do." Eleanor Roosevelt

I just came upon this quote and feel that it truly represents the spark journey.

When I first started, I honestly did not think I could do this. There had been so many attempts before, so many broken promises to myself and others. So many moments of sadness and self hatred for not being able to 'get this thing under control'.

And yet, a little spark ignited in me when I came upon SP. And it was tiny believe me. I was just coming off a 2 week binge of pure misery. Something had triggered it and yes the 'something' was pretty stressful, but there will always be stressful and difficult times in life. As well as easy, happy times. That's just life.

I think I felt so ashamed about my weight that I decided to give it 'just one more try'. And frankly there weren't a lot of strong feelings inside of motivation or "I can do this!' In fact the first month I kept eating and just started by going back to the gym. Man was that hard... I still see me schlepping myself up the stairs to the changing room, wondering why I had picked the only gym on the area with stairs!! But they welcomed me back with open arms and lots of encouragement, so I got back on the treadmill. Slowly....... emoticon

But I continued to overeat that first month. Candy and a book were my faithful companions. Throw in a few fast food meals, add lots of sauces, cheeses and gravy to dinner and that pretty much sums up month #1. I mistakenly thought I could deal with my pain through hiding in chicklit and bonbons. (Now doesn't that statement take you back in time!) emoticon

But it just didn't work. I became even more depressed and despaired of ever getting out of feeling like this. I also felt trapped in my heavy body. Trapped! I wanted out of this heaviness, heaviness of body but also of spirit. The spirit of someone who just didn't think they could do this. I frankly didn't think I had the will and the courage to even start! The last time I lost weight, I had a coach and a trainer and once they were gone, I sabotaged the whole process. And this time I had to do it on my own.

Now before you think, wow, what a depressing blog this is... There is a positive end. emoticon

I found SP while browsing online. I decided to join and see if it would work. And, yes it's working! I am losing weight, walking more than I have in a few years, eating healthy foods, tracking, blogging, exercising to videos, journaling and best of all ENJOYING the journey!
Yes! I am having fun!

I love reading everyone's progress and stories, silently rooting them on as they conquer one challenge after the other. One thing this has brought home to me, is that we all have our struggles and we all have to learn to deal with the ups and downs of life and still have the courage to practice self care as we deal with whatever has come our way. Not a new thought of course. But it's one thing to know that fact and it's another thing to read it day after day in everyone's posts. And I've said this before, but it truly humbles me to read them.

Whenever I get the feeling that this is too hard, I just think of you guys, out there every day just like me, struggling some days, gliding through with ease on others. But sticking with it.
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So, day after day, I am doing the thing that not that long ago, I thought I couldn't do. And it feels good and I am getting stronger.
One day at a time, just keep plugging. Do it, even when you don't feel like it, even when life comes with surprises, even when you think you can't. Just keep on going.

Eleanor, thank you, you were so right. emoticon





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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JILLIEWILLIE1 3/3/2013 8:03AM

    emoticon We Can do this...one day at a time!

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LEPETITCHIHUA 3/2/2013 4:05PM

    emoticon And it is so nice to have a friend like you to be in this journey! emoticon

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NORASPAT 3/2/2013 2:15PM

    You have all the knowledge to do this, you know yourself too. Like you said one day at a time.
When you slip up just get back up and track. Give yourself a small goal like -one day, then two and see how far you go before you have a problem.

Get over it and try again One day then two. It might give you an edge when you know you can go so many days at a time., HUGS Pat in Maine. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NORASPAT 3/2/2013 2:15PM

    You have all the knowledge to do this, you know yourself too. Like you said one day at a time.
When you slip up just get back up and track. Give yourself a small goal like -one day, then two and see how far you go before you have a problem.

Get over it and try again One day then two. It might give you an edge when you know you can go so many days at a time., HUGS Pat in Maine. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ROSAMARCELLE 3/2/2013 2:13PM

    emoticon emoticon You have made amazing progress. emoticon

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PJBONARRIGO 3/2/2013 1:57PM

    Woo hoo! Doing the happy dance for you. You are now doing the possible and that is awesome! I love Elenor's quote too :-) emoticon

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MARTYLYNN1 3/2/2013 1:06PM

    There are a lot of us traveling this same journey with you. Same story, change the names! That is what is so great about Sparkpeople. We are all trying to get healthier and break old destructive habits! I am so glad that you found Spark people and are on this journey with the rest of us.
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GAILANN48 3/2/2013 10:20AM

    ...and Sissie, YOU are so very right!

You brought me to tears with this blog - because of both your honesty about your journey, and the fact that I identified with every word. My experience is similar in many ways. Yes, you're without your old coach and your old trainer, but now you have good companions here. So you really aren't doing it alone (or at least none of us HAS to, though sometimes it might feel that way).

YOU ARE doing this! You are SUCCEEDING! Despite all the "stuff" that happens in our lives on a daily basis, we all can. It's really hard to fall down if you're in a group hug!

Thank you for sharing your heart. Hope you have a beautiful day today!

emoticon :) Gail

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CHERYL_ANNE 3/2/2013 10:16AM

    ... One day at a time, just keep plugging. Do it, even when you don't feel like it, even when life comes with surprises, even when you think you can't. Just keep on going. ...

Right to the emoticon of the matter.

You're a emoticon !!

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NUTRON3 3/2/2013 6:55AM

    Always good to push yourself

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BUSYGRANNY5 3/2/2013 6:07AM

    I love your blog and your story! You're doing great!

Keep on keeping on!

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LJCANNON 3/2/2013 5:49AM

    emoticon CONGRATULATIONS on your Progress so far ~ And on a Fabulous Blog! Keep on Enjoying The Journey and all the Blessings that you are Earning.

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POSITIVEPAULA8 3/2/2013 4:42AM

    Sounds like this time you are really ready to lose the weight this time and for yourself no point losing it for someone else. It will only work if you are truly ready deep within. If not you will just go back to your old ways like lots of us have done before.

It can be hard too if you are living with other people sometimes they just don't get it other times they can be so supportive. If you have health issues losing weight can certainly help with those issues as well.

Spark People is awesome! I'm so glad to have it myself. There is so much to this site I am still learning lots and finding out lots of helpful things and area's I did not know were on the site. Some of the message boards are good you can see if you can better your scores and get higher up the list. don't forget the Panic button is there if you feel you need it as well. There are many, many teams as well with topics of interest to each and everyone of us with people just like us in them.

So much to this wonderful site.

With it and the encouragement and support of the wonderful friends on here who are going through the same things as us regarding our weight loss (some a little differently than others of course) we can do it.

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emoticon Quote to by the way! So true!

Take care my friend, I have every faith that this time you will and can reach all your goals.

Paula emoticon



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FLOWERDALEJEWEL 3/2/2013 4:03AM

    You should never feel "ashamed" about your weight or your journey to try to lose it.

I've lost it and gained it back a couple of times, currently I'm on the gain phase due to menopause, I don't really like to be be on the gain side, but I just have to get on with it and "bite the bullet" so to speak.

There's more to me than my weight and hopefully people can see me for what and who I am.

We just have to keep pushing, we'll get there in the end
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Comment edited on: 3/2/2013 4:04:17 AM

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