Thursday, February 28, 2013
I had forgotten this part of fighting cancer--where you need to be pro-active in getting things going. I did it when hubby fought and beat melanoma back in 2006. Calls to Doctors, Insurance Companies, Labs, Pharmacies, arranging appointments, being with him every step of the way.
When the urologist's nurse called Monday morning with the positive results for prostate cancer, she told us we would need both a PET scan and a CT scan. At first we waited for the phone call from someone telling us when those would be, and then realized, we better pursue it ourselves (meaning ME) so that those tests would be done before our doctor appointment on March 11. So I started making calls, leaving messages, calling back, etc. You know the routine if you've ever tried to call doctor's offices. Even the nurses are too busy to talk to you right then and there. Computer go down, so results and schedules can't be accessed and "we'll have to call you back." So many details to remember, tests to have done, contrast to drink, appointments to keep. I really believe if I had not instigated a call to the urologist's office about getting these scans scheduled, it would have fallen through the cracks. I am almost certain the scans would not have been done before the doctor's appointment, if I had not made phones calls, and to me, this is VERY important. We need to know what we are dealing with when we meet with the doctor.
Someone, in their comments, advised me to go with hubby to ALL his appointments. That is a given. I have always done that, as he does with me. We are a team and we stick together like GLUE. I am there for every single test, consultation, appointment, and I do all the phone calling and arranging. That is how our team works! In fact I had a cleaning at the dentist and made an appt. for next Tue. for some follow up work. Well in calling back this morning, to find out when the scans are scheduled for, I discovered they too are scheduled for Tue. at approximately the same time--so the dentist appt. will be re-scheduled. Hubby takes priority!
We went to our friend's funeral yesterday. It was heartbreaking. All 12 of his grandchildren were there and one little boy went up to say goodbye to his Grandpa, and he just sobbed. It broke my heart. Our friend's widow (who is also a close friend) was very brave, she even got up during the service, and recited a very nice poem. I could not have done that. I hung onto my hubby for dear life all during the service. It was hard not to imagine myself having to go through all of that, and I certainly didn't want to think that way. But it's so hard to stay positive. That's why I think knowing what he has, how far it has spread, etc. will help. We will know what we are dealing with and what has to be done. He had horrible pain last night in his lower back. Of course I panic. Is it the cancer? Is it just rampant through his body? He complained that the hard pews in the church at the funeral hurt his prostate. I am just worried sick.
I met my oldest son for lunch yesterday before the funeral. My two oldest boys went with us to the service. Regarding hubby's cancer, my oldest son said exactly what I had been thinking, "We want to find out what it is, and we want to get it fixed NOW!" Several of his friends (he's 40) have lost parents already. He said it was always hard to identify with what they were dealing with when their parents were sick, but now he understands.
Life is tough, we lose people we love, we get sick, people we love get sick, we struggle with addictions. But when life is good, it is so great and we yearn to go back to those times when it was so good and seemed so easy. I know I took that normal living for granted and didn't appreciate it nearly enough. Just being normal, and not having health worries, is so precious. When I get hubby well, I'm going to really enjoy it!