Thursday, February 28, 2013
I mean do you think about the What ifs? in life then worry about them until they either do happen or you are convinced they dont??
Recently had a friend dianogsed with colon cancer. Now she had no idea. They went in for a scope and came out with the news. For a moment i had a holy crap moment. I mean we both have digestive/bowel disorders and i am due for anther scope coming up in the next few months and i thought that could be me. If i focus on that everyday it will control me. Its always in the back of my mind, but i cant let it take over.
But I dont freak over it. I will the day of the scope, that day i will be a wreck, i will be in tears i will be scared. But for the days inbetween i have to let it go. Or i will be a wreck until then. And my body gets very sick with stress, if i worry about everything that might happen to me, i am going to end up like i was last year. In bed, depressed totally paranoid. I have learned to push these things out of my ind.
I do stress about things But normal every day things. Like money. If my daughter will be ok when she goes off to college on her own in a few months......life. But not about things out of my control.
Cause lets face it, does stressing out and worrying make the situation better? does it make the answer come faster? NO. So whats the point in wasting all that energy on somehing that hasnt happened yet.
Kind of like my weight loss. I feel bad that i have been sick all week and havent been able to work out. But is that going to change anything ? no. So i am taking a deep breath and saying, its fine. I need time to recoup and therfore monday is the day i will get back into it. If i push too hard to fast i will only end up in pain, again.
I am not saying you shouldnt ever worry but about things that are going to happen anyways whether you worry or not, you are best to just take a deep breath, prepare for what might, but also prepare for what might not. Its not always bad.
So my scope, even though i always have that colon cancer worry in the back of my head, i am thinking positive that will be find what they need to find in order to get me well again.